Simple Not Simple https://simplenotsimple.com/ Simple Not Simple Tue, 08 Aug 2023 01:54:47 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.5 https://simplenotsimple.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/cropped-Favicon-32x32-1-32x32.png Simple Not Simple https://simplenotsimple.com/ 32 32 Releasing My Adult Child: A Mom’s Letter to Her Son https://simplenotsimple.com/2023/08/04/releasing-my-adult-child-a-moms-letter-to-her-son/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2023/08/04/releasing-my-adult-child-a-moms-letter-to-her-son/#respond Fri, 04 Aug 2023 18:38:02 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=8460 For parents who are sending off their kids to college and beyond. Posting the story of a mom and the letter she gave her son as he embarked on the road to adulthood. Pastor's wife, homeschooling mom and mother of two, Malou, shares her story and her wise words to Daniel, her first "arrow"

The post Releasing My Adult Child: A Mom’s Letter to Her Son appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_covervickytran
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Psalm 127:4. Photo by Vicky Tran from Pexels


As a parent who believes in the power of praying for our children, I realized that there were three desperate cries of prayer I’ve prayed for our first child, Daniel. The first was when I had him in my womb and I had a threatened miscarriage early in the pregnancy; the second was when he became a teenager and my husband Raymond and I felt incapable of raising him; and most recently, when we had to release him to college in a different country, halfway across the world.  

I never thought that releasing an arrow could be both exciting and bittersweet. And here was our first about to be released from our quiver.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_youngdaniel
Our miracle firstborn, Daniel, when he was 7 years old

Mixed emotions battled in my mind and heart when we found out that Daniel got accepted to a university in another country (so grateful for the scholarship!)

Both joy and sadness bubbled up within me. 

A part of me was so excited to see my son leave the house and be all that God wants him to be away from us–living the life of a university student.

But there was also a part of me asking the question, “why do this?” Just the thought of not seeing my son in our home or hugging him, and imagining our incomplete dinner times would instantly make me tear up.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_daniel
Our then 21-year-old touring his college campus

“Courage my dear.” I kept saying to myself. I need to trust God’s timing and ways in my son’s life. I will not be able to keep him forever.

As we prepared him (and ourselves) for the inevitable day, we wrote him a letter that we hoped would guide him as he embarked on an adventure soon to be of his own making–his first time on his own in a new school, new country, new normal.

Sharing with you an excerpt of our letter to him. We hope it will be helpful to parents who are raising their kids with the goal that one day, with faith and grace, to wholeheartedly release them from their quivers.

A few college tips for a homeschooler who is now about to see the world…

Dear Daniel,

These are a few college hacks. You will discover more along the way that will fit you as you graciously create your own culture:

  1. Discipline is key. Spiritual discipline tops all disciplines. Prayer, word & worship. Jesus Christ deserves only to be first, your first love. Let your life only revolve around Him. His love never ceases. He will not stop pursuing you.

  2. Take care of yourself. Self-love will help you love others. REST. Let your soul breathe.
  3. Responsibility before leisure. Time, Finance & Healthy Living. Calendar it and follow through.
  4. Be friendly and genuinely love on people, of all colors, shapes, and sizes. Chivalry (courage, honor, courtesy, justice, and a readiness to help) is in you.

  5. Find ways to serve and grow in a community. Be GENEROUS with your life and resources.
"Go Flames!" his new university's home team
simplenotsimple.motherhood.momandson
Despite being delayed by the pandemic, nothing could stop God’s plan as we watched him finally pack his bags and fly out to college.
simplenotsimple.motherhood.siblings
Sibling love. Hanging out with little sis Allison

6. Communicate consistently and respectfully with your teachers/professors, leaders, roommates, and your family, to us.

7. Be adventurous. Be safe.

8. Discover new things. Treasure old ones.

9. Be present at the moment. Take a lot of memories. They are thoughtful reminders of God’s goodness and grace.

10. Please ask for help. Don’t hesitate. Humility is you.

11. Guard your heart. You only have one. Filter life with God’s word.

12. Embrace the season of learning outside our home.

13. Let love, gratitude, and faithfulness never leave you.

14. Let the world see Christ in you.

15. The gospel has set you free. Freely share it.

These are my top 15 and I can go on and on. But these are more than enough. A mother’s care can be overwhelming and our only excuse is because we love them. In the meantime, 15 loving tips seem like a good enough number.

This is just a part of our story–a mom’s story. (Wait ’til you hear the story of the dad whose best buddy is his son.)

simplenotsimple.motherhood.maloufam3
Author Malou (2nd from left) with hubby Raymond (left to right), with arrows Allison and Daniel

For every parent reading this, who is currently tirelessly and generously sowing acts of service and love on her children, know that God sees your efforts and will not withhold His best from them.

He is a loving Father of reaping and harvest.

He loves our children more than we do and always will. He faithfully takes them by the hand, from one step to the next, from one journey to another in this school called life.

And as we entrust our children to Him, find reassurance in this reminder to,

Be strong. Take courage. Don’t be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; he won’t leave you.”

Deuteronomy 31:6 The Message

Update: Daniel is now in his senior year and is graduating soon. (How time flies!) His adventures, current passions (photography and short reels) and learnings are a constant joy to hear everytime he comes home on break. 

 Fellow moms, be reassured, God’s plan is to prosper them, not to harm them, to give them a hope and a future–so as you let go and see them off on their new adventure, sit back and watch them fly.

simplenotsimple.motherhood.danielsolo
Welcome home! Daniel back during summer break.
Malou de Guzman and husband Raymond have two children, Daniel (22) and Allison (13) whom they both homeschooled. Passionate about ministry, nature, music and travel, they both enjoy a lively discussion of culture, food and current events with their kids during meal times, usually over virtual calls. They are also founders of NextGenPublishers and co-authors of “When the World was Too Heavy to Carry” with her illustrated children’s book “When the World Was Without Light” as their latest release.

The post Releasing My Adult Child: A Mom’s Letter to Her Son appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2023/08/04/releasing-my-adult-child-a-moms-letter-to-her-son/feed/ 0
The Mama Blues: A Mom’s Call to Prayer https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/04/19/mama-blues-a-moms-call-to-prayer/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/04/19/mama-blues-a-moms-call-to-prayer/#respond Tue, 19 Apr 2022 01:56:28 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=8014 "How can I, a Bible-believing, faith-walking Christian, suddenly feel so helpless?" military wife, former missionary and mom of 3, Malen, gets real about postpartum depression and shares how five bible verses slowly helped her heal and find joy again.

The post The Mama Blues: A Mom’s Call to Prayer appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_coveralexisb2
"How can I, a Bible-believing, faith-walking Christian for decades now, suddenly feel so helpless?" Photo by Alexis B from Pexels

Mama Blues was a frequent guest in my house.

As an emotional person, I always had room for her in all seasons of mothering. At first, I thought it was okay that Mama Blues hung out with me. First time I met Mama B, it was with baby #1. Caring for a child for the first time was an enormous challenge and a totally a new thing for me.

Even though I was so happy to have a baby (after years of praying), I found myself suddenly hit by an overwhelming feeling of sadness and frustration. 

There were days I would cry out feeling helpless, ugly and worthless — flooded with negative emotions that made me feel insecure, unloved, and hurt.

(Hello, Mama B, nice to meet you.)

simplenotsimple_motherhood_malenpreggy
Ready to pop: ready or not

When I became a mother of two, then became pregnant with baby #3 (our first baby boy) but suffered a miscarriage at 20 weeks, Mama Blues was fast becoming a permanent guest — a comfortable guest who was now occupying my living space.

When we found out we were going to have our youngest, Hezekiah, a few years later, we were excited to finally have another baby boy. But, to our surprise, Heze was diagnosed with Down Syndrome and a heart condition during my first trimester.

Mama B was now sitting comfortably on our couch, eating with us at every meal and even showing up whenever I played with my kids — how did this happen? And why was she now almost like a member of the family?

How can I, a Bible-believing, faith-walking Christian for decades now, suddenly feel so helpless in the face of this unwanted guest?

In my heart, I knew this was not God’s plan for me but why was there still such an undeniable weight that had now found a cozy spot on my shoulders? 

simplenotsimple_motherhood_tricycle2
Babies on board: Heavily pregnant with baby #2 and riding a local tricycle during an outreach while baby #1 napped

Why couldn’t I “shake” the blues away?

I know that, to a large degree, postpartum hormones and lack of sleep both play major roles in our moods after giving birth, but as Christians, it’s also important to remember that a spiritual battle is also happening. 

And that oftentimes “fighting the blues” means giving up.

Giving up control (over our lives and our children) and giving it up to the One who gave us our lives and kids in the first place. 

I have prayed these verses over and over in my life everytime I needed God’s help to drive away the Mama Blues.

There are many more verses in the word of God but here are five that have really spoken to my mama heart and have helped me break through the darkness and brought me joy again.

I’ve included a few simple prayers I’ve prayed through my darkest moments, I hope these will speak to the mama in you, too. 

simplenotsimple_motherhood_3kids
Fact of life as a military wife: raising kids alone while husband Josh is deployed for months at a time...at the time this was taken, he was serving in the Middle East for 5 months

1. Psalm 94:19 NIV

When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.”

Dear Lord,

There are too many things I constantly worry about that are beyond my control. Please calm my soul and give me wisdom to rest and relax. Life is difficult right now but please give me joy in the little victories I see.  When anxiety is becoming great in my life, please help me see beyond the struggles. Please give me back the joy of seeing my beautiful children: who they are now and what they will become in the future. Thank you that the joy that comes from You is becoming my strength for today, Amen.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_beach4
The darkest valley for us was the day we lost baby #3 to a miscarriage, we named him Heaven

2. Psalm 23:4

“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and staff, they comfort me.”

Dear Lord,

I worry about my future and my kids’ futures. I worry about the world and everything that’s going on around me. This pandemic made it worse. But thank you, Lord, for You are with me and my family even in our darkest valleys. I know I don’t have to be afraid because You are with me and that You’re always watching over us. Thank you for Your protection. Thank you for Your comfort and grace. Amen.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_beach2
This was one of the hardest days for us as parents--Josh and I releasing our son Heaven's ashes at a seaside memorial

3. Corinthians 12:9 NIV

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

Dear Lord,

Thank you that You are my help. Even in my weakness, You are strong in my life. I cannot do everything else in a day or even in a lifetime, But I thank you for your sufficient grace that sustains me every day. Please give me the strength to overcome my weakness. Please help me see that even when I am weak and overwhelmed, your strength sustains me. Amen.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_withjosh3
Our 4th child and miracle son, Hezekiah, was born with Down Syndrome a few years later. In a moment of weakness, I asked my husband, "why us?", my husband answered, "why not us?"

4. Isaiah 40:31 NIV

“…but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint.”

Dear Lord,

I know You have given me strength as a mom to handle all the demands of life. Please give me supernatural strength to manage my household well.  Many times I really get tired and exhausted. I want to throw in the towel (but I can’t because I know I have to wash it after). Please help me run and not grow weary. Please help me walk and not be faint. Thank you that You will sustain me. Amen.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_beachsolo
Finding a bit of quiet and solitude before mama duties start calling once again

5. Matthew 11:28-30 NIV

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Dear Jesus,

That’s me – tired, weary and burdened. There is so much to do for the day and I feel I have not done anything. I am too exhausted, Lord, to even think and plan what’s ahead. I come to you today asking for rest! Please give me rest for my soul. Replace my burdens with Your strength. Thank you that You will take care of me and my family. Amen.

Yes, every mother will agree that motherhood is challenging and stressful, but it’s reassuring to know that God is for us and wants us to enjoy and live our lives to the fullest.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_familypic
All smiles: celebrating the wins with husband Josh and our three kids: Hanna (l-r), Hosanna and Heze

Dear Mamas, my hope is that these verses and simple prayers will help jumpstart your way out of the Mama Blues — the way that they did for this overwhelmed mama, if not more.

May you live the abundant life that God has in store for you. Even though we have things to do, plans to make and mountains of responsibilities to accomplish, by God’s grace we will overcome. 

Malen Talusan-Hvidding enjoys the sun in Hawaii and the rain in Washington State with husband Joshua, adorable son Hezekiah and his two sisters, Hosanna and Hanna. According to her, she is not a writer, nor a bestselling author, she just loves encouraging people and happens to be surrounded by writers who push her to write about her experiences at Mama Brain Blog.

The post The Mama Blues: A Mom’s Call to Prayer appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/04/19/mama-blues-a-moms-call-to-prayer/feed/ 0
How To Parent Our Kids in the Digital Age https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/03/28/parenting-kids-in-the-digital-age/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/03/28/parenting-kids-in-the-digital-age/#respond Mon, 28 Mar 2022 01:31:07 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=7805 "As much as digital consumption is inevitable, it doesn’t mean we should allow it to take over our lives," parenting speaker and pastor's wife Jenn opens up about her struggles parenting in the digital age and the practical guidelines that have helped her raise her brood of four kids in this digital generation

The post How To Parent Our Kids in the Digital Age appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_cottonbro2
"As much as digital consumption is inevitable, it doesn’t mean we should allow it to take over our lives" Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

Unfortunately, we’ve already entered an era where it’s almost impossible to take the gadgets away from our children, especially if they’re in school. I once grounded my son from gadget use because of bad behavior and he exclaimed “You’re taking away my life!”

At that moment, it sounded overly dramatic, but upon further reflection, it did make sense. He does his research for school, he learns to play the guitar, he keeps in touch with his friends, he learns to cook, etc. — all on the gadget.

Everyday, we wrestle with this problem — how do we regulate our kids’ digital consumption?

Admittedly, in our household, our kids are already heavy digital consumers. In this pandemic, they are even more so. Especially when all education and socialization migrated online, their consumption became even higher than ever.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_cottonbro
"Is our digital consumption bringing us closer as a family or farther apart?" Photo by cottonbro from Pexels

As a family, this is an issue we struggle with every day and honestly we are still in the process of figuring out the rhythm that works best for us.

But, fortunately, as much as digital consumption is inevitable, it doesn’t mean we should allow it to take over our lives.

What we’ve found to work for us as a family is to ask ourselves questions to give us guidelines for check and balance. Here are a few that have helped us re-focus our direction as a family amid the new normal:

  1. Is God still first in our home?
  2. Is our digital consumption bringing us closer as a family or farther apart?
  3. Am I in control over my digital usage as well as my kids’?

If the answer is yes to all 3, kudos to you, dear parent! You are on the right track. But if you’re still struggling to find that rhythm and balance that seem so elusive in this day and age of digital exposure and incessant virtual connection, we hope to share some practical things we’ve done in our home that have helped us establish a rhythm that works.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_markusspiske
"We filled a box with costumes, capes, shawls, masks, swords and sticks that the kids enjoyed for hours and hours of imaginative play" Photo by Markus Spiske from Pexels
simplenotsimple_motherhood_arthousestudio
"Pets are another great alternative" Photo by ArtHouse Studio from Pexels

1. Provide non-digital options for your children.

We always tell our children to spend less time on their gadgets. But what alternatives are we offering them? Make sure your home is stocked with toys, boardgames and books that they find interesting.

When my kids were younger, we had this big plastic box that we called the iBox (short for imagination box.) We filled that box with costumes, capes, shawls, masks, swords and sticks and the kids enjoyed hours and hours of imaginative play with all those props.

Tip: It doesn’t have to cost anything. Go through your closets/kitchen/garden to find a variety of random items to fill your own iBox. Hats, accessories, plastic or wooden kitchen utensils, aprons, bedsheets, pillowcases, branches, flowers (and the list goes on…) can all spark and nurture your child’s instinct to create and role play.

Pets are another great alternative. Allowing your children to have pets develops different character traits like responsibility, compassion and hard work.

Designate times of the day when you can go out of the house with the kids to the park or the basketball court.

Encourage them to play outdoors, run around or bike. It’s also a good way to get their daily dose of Vitamin D into their systems.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_yankrukov
"Encourage your kids to put their creativity to work by setting up an art nook that has colored pencils, water color, scissors, glue and lots and lots of paper" Photo by Yan Krukov from Pexels
"Compose songs together about something they’re interested in" Photo by Ron Lach from Pexels

2. Encourage your kids to create more than consume.

Admittedly, it’s easier to just give the children their gadgets — they’re quiet, they keep to themselves, they don’t fight, there’s no mess, they don’t disturb you. The house actually seems more peaceful when every child is tucked in their own little corner with their gadget.

However, consuming from the gadget the whole day doesn’t give them the opportunity to develop other facets of their creativity. 

“Most people assume that imagination takes place in the head, but the hands are just as important. To help children generate ideas for projects, we often encourage them to start messing around with materials. As children play with LEGO bricks or tinker with craft materials, new ideas emerge. What started as an aimless activity becomes the beginning of an extended project,” says source.

Encourage your kids to put their creativity to work by setting up an art nook that has colored pencils, water color, scissors, glue and lots and lots of paper.

Schedule cooking sessions when mom and the kids can bake cupcakes together. Compose songs together about something they’re interested in. Make your own music videos where everyone gets to dress up.

Simple conversation starters make meal times the perfect time to connect with one another. Printable cards by imom.com
simplenotsimple_motherhood_ketutsubiyanto
"Bedtimes can be a good time for conversations as well. Lie down with your child for the last few minutes of each day and ask him or her how her day went" Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels

3. Intentionally make space for conversations

Shape your environment in such a way that will push everyone in the direction of connecting with God and with others. Train the kids to put away their gadgets and talk to each other for a length of time.

Make meal times a gadget-free zone.

Remind everyone to leave their phones or laptops in the other room while everyone is seated at the dining table. Print out conversation starter cards (there’s a lot of fun ones on Pinterest) and let everyone take turns picking out a card and answering it.

Bedtimes can be a good time for conversations as well. Lie down with your child for the last few minutes of each day and ask him or her how her day went. A basic question you can start with is “What’s the best and worst part of your day?”

simplenotsimple_motherhood_ketutsubiyanto
"Offer it as a reward for good behavior or take it away as a consequence for bad behavior." Photo by Ketut Subiyanto from Pexels
simplenotsimple_motherhood_augustderichelieu
"Teach your kids internet safety and how to protect themselves online" Photo by August de Richelieu from Pexels

4. Establish boundaries

Healthy boundaries are always good.

They teach your kids self-control and discipline. Do not give your kids unlimited time for gadgets. Set a start and end time everyday.

Offer it as a reward for good behavior or take it away as a consequence for bad behavior. If your children are below school age, I would discourage from giving them gadgets too early.

Monitor the websites they go to, the videos they watch, the games they play and the people they chat with. They cannot just be allowed to visit any website.

You can start with a shortlist of allowable sites for them and expand them as they become more responsible. The digital space can be very dangerous, especially for young kids. Parents should always be watchful.

Most importantly, teach your kids internet safety and how to protect themselves online — learning this skill with your guidance now will equip and empower your children to navigate wisely in a world that is constantly plugged in.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_jennfamily
Author Jenn (second from left) with husband Paolo and their brood of digital natives (from l-r) Janina, Ryan, Joaquin, Nathan and daughter-in-law Pauline
Jenn Punzalan is a wife, mom of 4 ranging in age from 26 to 13 years old, longtime homeschooling mom, resource speaker for marriage, parenting and singlehood as well as co-creator of The Punzees which focuses on Christian living and family values.

The post How To Parent Our Kids in the Digital Age appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/03/28/parenting-kids-in-the-digital-age/feed/ 0
Minimalist Style for Your WFH Space https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/03/03/minimalist-style-for-your-work-area/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/03/03/minimalist-style-for-your-work-area/#respond Thu, 03 Mar 2022 20:50:12 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=7515 "A minimalist set-up is one of the things that helps me focus while working from home. I believe that keeping my workspace very simple increases my productivity," explains wife, mom and WFH banker Laidee, about how a simple work area with a minimalist mindset helps her focus so she can give her best while working from home.

The post Minimalist Style for Your WFH Space appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_style_coveralexandruacea
"I found that a minimalist set-up is one of the things that helped me focus when I went on WFH mode. I believe that keeping my workspace very simple increases my productivity." Photo by Alexandru Acea on Unsplash

Two years into the pandemic and many, if not all of us, have had to survive and adapt immediately by shifting our bedroom, living room (or any available spot at home, really) into an instant working area.

From having a dedicated table at the office where corporate efficiency was implemented to a last-minute, work from home set-up amid a very busy home environment — kids doing online education, spouse attending back to back meetings, a kitchen that never stops…and the list goes on — we all needed to find a fast solution. 

What I found to be a lifesaver for me was a minimalist set-up. I really believe that keeping my workspace very simple helped increase my productivity. It helped me focus faster and better when I had to go on WFH mode.

Sharing how I set out to come up with a work area that was inspired by the 5S system we use at the office to my makeshift WFH space. 

What is the 5-S System?

“5-S is a systematic way of organizing workplaces by eliminating waste, improving flow, and reducing the number of processes where possible. It applies the five Japanese principles: Sort (“seiri”), Set in order (“seiton”), Shine (“seiso”), Standardize (“seiketsu”), and Sustain (“shitsuke”). These principles were pioneered by Toyota Motor Company and has improved efficiency in their manufacturing facilities.”

Here are some tips on how to achieve a minimalist work-from-home set-up using these simple principles:

My WFH set-up: "This corner gives me 2 clean walls and options for my online meetings. Plus, having it in a corner reassures me that no one is caught dancing in the background during meetings."

Find the right spot

It is crucial to find the best spot in the house where you can focus on your work and move comfortably.

As much as possible, find a spot that is far from the middle of the action at home. I found a quiet corner at the top of the stairs on our second floor that worked perfectly. 

Locate an area where a table, chair and maybe a small cabinet can fit but not crowd.

This area must complement your goals — a clutter-free area is a basic requirement. Resist the urge to hoard.

Get rid of “stuff”  like boxes, paper bags, plastic containers etc. — these will not only clutter your area but your mind as well.

In addition, comfort is key, a comfortable chair and roomy legroom both help make this simple WFH set-up ideal.

simplenotsimple_style_gabriel-beaudry
"Choose a simple table (with a flat, smooth surface) and chair instead of a fancy one with too many details and patterns." Photo by Gabriel Beaudry on Unsplash 

Pick the right furniture

Use small but functional pieces. Stick to what you need, not to what looks “pretty”.

The goal is to keep clean lines that collaborate with the minimalist look.

Go for a simple table (with a flat, smooth surface) and chair instead of a fancy one with too many details and patterns. 

Do you know that the latin root word of minimalism is “minimus”? It means “smallest or least” so definitely no to bulky furniture.

simplenotsimple_style_swatches
"Do you know that according to studies, color and textures can affect your emotions and mind clarity?" Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash

Simple is beautiful

I strongly believe that simple design is beautiful. And it includes color, shape, lines, texture and proportion. I’m personally biased to neutral colors so my best bets are beige, taupe, gray, cream, and of course white.

Some may consider brown and black but it might look too “heavy” and “crowded” when you have a small area.

Lighter shades will make your space look bigger and brighter.

But don’t be afraid to throw in some color. An accent piece will not hurt. Just be careful and remind yourself that the goal is minimalism.

Keep the shapes, lines and texture as plain as possible because prints can be distracting. Do you know that according to studies, color and textures can affect your emotions and mind clarity?

Who wants to be distracted when working, right?

simplenotsimple_style_ikea
A moveable stack of drawers in a neutral color will keep documents, office supplies and necessary odds and ends in one convenient spot. White Alex drawer unit from Ikea.

Organizers are your best friends

Organize. Organize. Organize. 

Find the best storage solution that will suit your needs.

Make sure to narrow down what your office essentials are, this will help make it easier to find efficient storage solutions that will work for your new “office”.

This could save you from wasting money on supplies/organizers you won’t find useful in the long run.

Tips to keep your space clutter-free:

Always remind yourself that less is more. Here are some suggestions:

  1. Don’t bring out your stocks all at once. For example, bring out just one or two pens. You don’t really need all your pens out at one time. Also, stacks of scratch paper and dusty books on top of the table are definite no-nos. Keep or throw everything else. Personally, only my laptop and iPad (planner and notes in one) are left on the desk at the end of the day. It helps my mind switch to work mode more easily the next morning.
simplenotsimple_style_wrokspace2
The remains of the day: "Only my laptop and iPad (planner and notes in one) are left on the desk at the end of the day"
simplenotsimple_style_workbag2
Handy multi-use storage within easy reach is a must. Also returning each item after every use will help keep yourself organized
simplenotsimple_style_notebooks
Use notebooks or planners instead of cluttering your space with sticky Post-Its for important reminders. Photo by STIL on Unsplash

2. Use a planner or notebook instead of too many sticky notes.

3. Practice CLAYGO (Clean As You Go). Used coffee cups, candy wrappers and empty chip bags should not stay overnight. I’m sure you wouldn’t want uninvited visitors (find out how to get rid of ants here) hanging around your work area either.

simplenostimple_style_family2
Multi-tasking momma and author Laidee keeps WFH life together with husband Jam and daughters Vashti and Thany

Always remember: Clean is the new Beautiful. You don’t have to break the bank to have a nice workspace.

And you really don’t need a lot of things around you to do the work that needs to be done.

You just have to have the right mindset — a minimalist mindset and habits will help you get the job done.

Happy decorating (or in this case, un-decorating)!

Laidee Capistrano is wife to Jam and mother to 2 beautiful girls, Vashti (10) and Thany (6).  Banker by day and hobbyist carpenter by night, she is a Risk Management Officer who also likes organizing homes, restoring furniture, up-cycling, and DIYs after work, check out her latest projects at LaideeLikes.

The post Minimalist Style for Your WFH Space appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/03/03/minimalist-style-for-your-work-area/feed/ 0
Self-Care: Lessons My Garden Taught Me To Care for Body, Mind, Soul, Spirit https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/21/self-care-lessons-my-garden-taught-me-to-care-for-body-mind-soul-spirit/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/21/self-care-lessons-my-garden-taught-me-to-care-for-body-mind-soul-spirit/#respond Mon, 21 Feb 2022 01:00:44 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=7122 "Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these," pastor's wife and mom Brenda talks about lessons she's learned about self-care from her garden and how the true Gardener tends to her body, mind, soul and spirit

The post Self-Care: Lessons My Garden Taught Me To Care for Body, Mind, Soul, Spirit appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_garden
"Self-care is not synonymous with self-indulgence or being selfish. Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy, you can be well, you can do your job, you can help and care for others, and you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day,” says Everyday Health.com. Photo by Robin Wersich on Unsplash

When I think of self-care I naturally turn to my love for nature and gardening. Unlike most newly birthed pandemic plantitos/titas, my love for plants didn’t happen during the pandemic but through my growing up years with my father who loved cultivating orchids and bonsai to my many years of exposure, experience and experimentation as a biology student.

But before we get started, what is self-care? And why is it so important?

What is self-care?

According to this source, “Self-care is not synonymous with self-indulgence or being selfish. Self-care means taking care of yourself so that you can be healthy, you can be well, you can do your job, you can help and care for others, and you can do all the things you need to and want to accomplish in a day.”

If the definition of self-care is taking care of myself so that I can function at my best then what I’ve found to be personally effective, sustainable and longlasting was simply found outside our window.

We live in a house that sits across some vacant lots, it has proven to be an ideal location to cultivate some herbs, vegetables and fruits that have given our family not just sustenance for our bodies (and engaging homeschool activities) but sustenance for our minds, souls and spirits as well. 

Let me share what I’ve discovered about nature and the lessons it has taught me about self-care — all from tending to my garden.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_soil
Get your hands dirty: a “friendly” bacteria commonly found in soil activates brain cells to produce the brain chemical seratonin which is the body's natural antidepressant. Photo by Gabriel Jimenez on Unsplash

It helps my body heal.

It’s common knowledge that fresh herbs, vegetables and fruits are best for our physical bodies especially since a healthy immune system during this time can mean the difference between life and death but did you know that digging in the soil is also good for your mental health? 

“Digging in the soil stirs up microbes and inhaling these microbes can stimulate serotonin production, which can make you feel relaxed and happier,” states Forbes.

According to sources, a “friendly” bacteria commonly found in soil activates brain cells to produce the brain chemical seratonin which is the body’s natural antidepressant.

Nature literally brings life.

Oftentimes, we can care for our bodies with the simplest things to help them heal — enough sleep, fresh food, fresh air and fresh soil.

Nature gives the best medicine.  And the best part is, usually, it can be found just outside our doors.

simplenotsimepl_motherhood_brenda2
Freshly picked from our backyard garden, ingredients for Dinengdeng, my favorite Ilocano dish
simplenotsimple_motherhood_plantdaughter
We bring the outdoors in with house plants -- their vibrant refreshing colors, fresh dose of oxygen, and their natural absorption of harmful toxins and carbon dioxide -- make them important and regular accents in our living room, bedrooms and bathrooms

It helps my mind understand His design.

As an educator, I understand that nature points to a Creator. My default in teaching always goes back to where everything started – the story of Creation in the book of Genesis. It points us to God being the supreme Creator and us, human beings, as His co-creators,  stewards, students, and as sons called to rule over His creation. 

Surely, we will never run out of new things to discover and explore just by studying what’s all around us — how truly intricate, beautiful and functional His design is in nature.

How can there ever be a doubt that the same Creator who designed these wonderful lifegiving, fruit-bearing, oxygen-producing, sweet-smelling trees and plants around us is the same Creator who calls us His best work — His masterpieces; each precious, fearfully and wonderfully made and unique in calling, beauty, giftings and purpose.

It’s a beautiful reminder that like a garden there are no two exactly alike — so there is no need for competition, no need for comparison and no need to covet — each of us is loved, important, beautiful and special in His sight.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_harvest
My kids learn a lot through nature study -- I teach them many subjects and skills in homeschooling in what we call "Amazing Nature Studies" 
simplenotsimple_motherhood_soloavocado
"The same Creator who designed these wonderful lifegiving, fruit-bearing, oxygen-producing, sweet-smelling trees and plants around us is the same Creator who calls us His best work"

It reminds me that He is the lover of my soul.

What is the soul?

“The soul is basically our mind, our emotions, and our will. It is who we are as human beings,” says Christianity.com

With all the things on my plate, I need time for solitude, alone time with the Lord.  It has always been innate in me to connect with God through nature as a ‘naturalist’ — as I discovered while reading Gary Thomas’ Sacred Pathways: Discover Your Soul’s Path to God — it simply means each of us has a unique way we interact with God and mine is through nature.

Read more about pathways here.  

Being a naturalist, I need to retreat from city life, by myself or with friends, and go on nature trips. 

I’m glad that I share the same passion with my husband — aiming to hike up one mountain per year. The best and memorable ones have been our treks up Mt. Apo, Pulag, Ulap, Arayat, Pinatubo, Pico De Loro, Sagada, Batad, with some side trips to swim in nature’s hot springs and waterfalls. 

I am able to care for my soul when I take the time to find out the unique way the lover of my soul connects with me.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_mtapo
Summit of Mt. Apo: "I’m glad that I share the same passion with my husband, aiming to hike up one mountain per year"
simplenotsimple_motherhood_pinatubo
The crater of Mt. Pinatubo up close. Being a naturalist, I need to retreat from city life to go on nature trips, this was one of our most memorable

It comforts my spirit.

If I can’t go out of town, I know I have a go-to-place just beside our house – my garden. Here in this spot, I have had good times conversing with Him.  I begin mostly with, “Thank you, God, for such beautiful handiwork!”

He then usually impresses a song in my heart that makes me sing and worship. As I get my shovel and start to dig, God would whisper to me, what’s the condition of my heart, is it dry, rocky, full of weeds, or is it healthy soil? 

As I cut out branches, I’m reminded of the pains, hurts, or troubles that I’ve been through, after which His comforting words whisper, “you are my child, this is my way of disciplining and pruning you, but know that I love you and I AM holding you”.

In the many times that I fear, many times, too, I am reminded of the verse, “Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!” Luke 12:27-28.

In this verse, I get fresh faith that I am more valuable than all the lilies and grass in the field combined. Surely, my God will provide!

simplenotsimple_motherhood_shovel
What’s the condition of my heart, is it dry, rocky, full of weeds, or is it healthy soil? Photo by gryffyn m on Unsplash 
simplenotsimple_motherhood_pots
"Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these." Photo by Daniel Öberg on Unsplash
simplenotsimple_motherhood_family
Meet the FamiLee: Author Brenda with husband Richard and kids (l-r) Reuel, Raah, and Rei

Coming from a gardener’s point of view, I understand that there is a greater Gardener in me. One who nurtures, prunes, weeds out sin from my heart so the seed of His Word will grow and produce much fruit — for His honor and glory.

So in between times of being a wife, mom, doing chores, homeschooling, ministry time, I need to check my garden from time to time, literally and figuratively, so that I can welcome His care and refreshing for my body, mind, soul and spirit — a necessary practice for every wife and mom! 

So yes, fellow busy wives and moms, I encourage you to find out what your garden is and take the time to find your own unique self-care routine. It is a must!

Brenda Agramon-Lee is a pastor’s wife who has been married to husband Richard for 18 years. They have 3 wonderful children, Raah Briana 15, Reuel Benaiah, 12, and Rei Berechiah, 10. After many years in the academe as a biology researcher and teacher, she has decided to be a full-time homemaker while currently pursuing her MA in Counseling at a seminary school. Despite her active schedule, she manages to go on many nature adventures with her family, follow the Familee here.

The post Self-Care: Lessons My Garden Taught Me To Care for Body, Mind, Soul, Spirit appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/21/self-care-lessons-my-garden-taught-me-to-care-for-body-mind-soul-spirit/feed/ 0
New Year, New Hue for 2022! How to Introduce Pantone’s “Very Peri” Into Your Home https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/11/new-year-new-hue-how-to-introduce-pantones-very-peri-into-your-home/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/11/new-year-new-hue-how-to-introduce-pantones-very-peri-into-your-home/#respond Fri, 11 Feb 2022 00:43:47 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6710 Need a home design refresh? Since our homes are headquarters for most of our activities nowadays, it's always a refreshing boost to change it up once in a while. Enter “Very Peri” Pantone's color of the year! Described as “daring and courageous,” it can be a bit tricky to use without some expert advice. Interior designer Rachelle shares some simple tricks of the trade to show us how to introduce this fresh bold color into our homes

The post New Year, New Hue for 2022! How to Introduce Pantone’s “Very Peri” Into Your Home appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_style_door
Need a home design refresh? Meet Pantone's color of the year for 2022 -- find out how simple tips from an expert can help freshen up our homes with this "daring and courageous color". Photo by Behzad Ghaffarian on Unsplash

Pantone’s Color of the Year announcement is one of the most awaited events in the design industry, as the chosen color—which is chosen by Pantone experts based on studies of trends over the years—is used in creating products in the interior, product, and fashion design fields.

The color authority’s declared pick for 2022 is Very Peri, which, according to the site, is a “daring and courageous color” meant to reflect the changing sensibilities of our world.

simplenotsimple_style_peri2
simplenotsimple_style_pantone
Hello, purple! Don't be intimidated by this "ube" hue, in just the right doses, this cool color can add a breath of fresh air into your home

Inspired by the color periwinkle, Very Peri is a medium-violet tint with a sharp undertone of blue, and this is where “daring and courageous” comes in: it can be a bit tricky to use!

Unlike other past, popular Pantone Colors of the Year which were mostly in the warm tones that go well with beige, brown, and other toasty neutrals, Very Peri is a cool hue, and thus works best with other cool tints such as blue, mint green, pure white, cool gray, and other colors in the lavender-purple family.

So, if you are not used to cool colors, I’d say it is safest to use Very Peri in white, light beige, and light gray interior palettes.

But it’s still quite easy to incorporate the Color of the Year into your home. Here are some suggestions on how you can use it: 

In pillows, throws, and other soft furnishings

Throw pillows in Very Peri would stand out against a white or light beige sofa. Choose pillows in different textures or patterns: tweedy or plain-colored twill, paisley or ikat print. A Very Peri throw would look great on a dark gray L-shaped sofa, too.

simplenotsimple_style_amazonthrowpillow
Change out your old throw pillows for some Very Peri ones. The perfect accent to a white or beige sofa. Throw pillow from Amazon
Make a dark gray sofa cozy with this plush purple throw. Periwinkle throw blanket from Atlanuh

In decorative accessories

Vases and other small tabletop accessories could add just a wee bit of Very Peri to your space, if you’re color-shy.

But if you’re truly brave, add a deep Very Peri sofa to your vignette—it will make a stunning accent against a dark gray wall.   

Just a touch of this bold color in pretty pottery adds some sugar and spice to your space. Porcelain ceramic by CarysBoyleCeramics
simplenotsimple_style-farberware
Who says kitchenware needs to be boring? Add an appetizing flavor to your kitchen with some eyecatching pots and pans. Kitchenware by Farberware

In nature—through your plants and cut flowers

Another subtle way to incorporate Very Peri into your home is through fresh (or faux) flowers.

Orchids, purple statis (this can be dried and used for a very long time), or even simple mums come in this beautiful, soothing color.

simplenotsimple_style_orchid
Fresh orchids or other floral varieties are an easy temporary choice if you're not quite ready to commit to this vibrant color. Photo by José Ignacio González Pansiera on Unsplash
Opt for dried flowers on a foyer table for a low maintenance alternative. Photo by Michelle Tresemer on Unsplash

As paint in a children’s room

Very Peri is a nice, unisex hue that isn’t as predictable as baby pink or powder blue. Plus, this color grows up well with the child; no need for repainting when they reach the tween and teen years! 

Use this color sparingly in a kid's bedroom or playroom with graphic wall stickers. Design from Tenstickers
simplenotsimple_style_wall
Or go all out with paint and play around with shades from the same color palette. Design from Westwing Italy

In a powder room

Your powder room is the smallest room in your house, and because of this, you can be quite experimental with it. Paint the walls around your tiles in Very Peri to give this space a cozy, cocooning effect.

simplenotsimple_style_powderroom
A small powder room handles this tricky color easily -- giving the tiny space a cocooning effect. Design image from Shelterness
Or test it out it small doses with towels in this soft hue. Towels by Luzia
simplenotsimple_style_candle
What bathroom isn't complete without a pretty candle or two in this "aesthetic" color. Candle by Sephora

So whether you choose to dive in with both feet or choose to take small bite size accents of Very Peri into your home — let this “daring and courageous color” resonate with you as we enter the year that calls us all to be both daring and courageous as well. 

simplenotsimple_style_rachgoldo
Author Rachelle, here with son Goldo, enjoys writing about design, museums, art and how she makes tiny condo living work for her as a busy wfh mom
Guest contributor Rachelle Medina is a licensed interior designer and the former editor of Real Living, the Philippines’ leading home and shelter title. Rachelle has covered the home and lifestyle beat for the past 20 years, and is currently a content editor for various design and art websites. Follow her on Instagram @rachelle.medina.design and read her blog for more design inspiration.

The post New Year, New Hue for 2022! How to Introduce Pantone’s “Very Peri” Into Your Home appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/11/new-year-new-hue-how-to-introduce-pantones-very-peri-into-your-home/feed/ 0
The Core Wardrobe: Ten Clothing Styles Every Woman Needs In Her Closet https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/08/core-wardrobe-ten-essential-clothing-styles-every-woman-needs/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/08/core-wardrobe-ten-essential-clothing-styles-every-woman-needs/#respond Tue, 08 Feb 2022 01:29:17 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6616 "Think of them as the ever reliable building blocks or foundation on which to build post-worthy OOTDs; cute on their own but also basic enough to be in the background when you're inspired to dress up." Former fashion editor, Binky, helps simplify our closets by listing down the essentials that make a great core wardrobe

The post The Core Wardrobe: Ten Clothing Styles Every Woman Needs In Her Closet appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_style_cover2
As we purge our closets of clothing we've outgrown, grown tired of or don't suit our needs anymore -- make sure to keep these basics. These ten essential styles will get you through any season, decade or clothing size. Photo by Sarah Dorweiler on Unsplash

Getting dressed should be easy, but it isn’t always so.

How many times have you stood in front of your closet staring at your clothes waiting for the cute outfit muse to visit?  On days when she is a no-show, here are a few reliable must-haves to help give you that Monday morning jolt you need on days when the fashion light bulb just won’t switch on.

Think of them as the ever reliable building blocks or foundation on which to build post-worthy OOTDs; cute on their own but also basic enough to be in the background when the muse does appear.

Take note:  As seasons, bodies and lifestyles change, updating to different silhouettes/materials of these basics every few years is expected. But, rest assured, these ten essential styles will always remain evergreen in your closets. 

simplenotsimple_style_blazerzara2
Ecru blazer by Zara
simplenotsimple_style_blazerzara
Salmon blazer by Zara

1. BLAZER

A blazer can instantly elevate an outfit from so-so to pulled together.

Black is always good but it can be in whatever color suits you and your wardrobe best.

Try this season’s pastel colors and slouchier silhouette for a fresh, relaxed style that will brighten up your wardrobe and your mood.

Oversized white shirt by Mango

2. WHITE LONG SLEEVED SHIRT

Oversized or just right, rolled up sleeves or buttoned at the cuffs — you really can’t go wrong with this one.

Wear over jeans, formal pants, shorts or as a tunic — it can even work as a swimsuit cover-up in a pinch. 

Think Carolina Herrera, this style icon has even worn this classic top to gala events!

A true essential — it never goes out of style.

Snakeskin georgette mini dress by Michael Kors

3. SOFT, FLOWY DRESS

Sometimes you just need to wear something pretty to feel pretty.

A soft, frilly dress could be just what the day calls for.

Wear it with sneakers to dial it down or go all out feminine and pair with strappy sandals.

Dark-wash mom jeans by H&M

4. DARK UNDISTRESSED JEANS

We love our faded and shredded jeans, but dark undistressed jeans deserve love and attention too.

A true blue pair sans holes will match well with almost anything and can go almost anywhere.

Choose a style that works best for your body type.

Remember: fit trumps trends particularly for jeans.

simplenotsimple_style_whoteteemango
Essential cotton-blend T-shirt by Mango

5. BASIC TEE

This sounds pretty basic, but the perfect white tee can be more elusive than jeans that fit perfectly.

There is no one perfect white tee; it varies from person to person.

Grab more than one when you find the one that checks all your boxes; grab it in black and the latest nude/blush shades too while you’re at it.

simplenotsimple_style_mkpencilskirt
Nautical top by Michael Kors
simplenotsimple_style_mkstripe2
Wide striped sweater by Michael Kors

6. STRIPED TOP

A woven button up or a tee. Choose from the two or have both. Stripes are classic and no closet should be without them.

Freshen up the look by  choosing exaggerated dimensions or interesting details — buttons, slits, patches or eye-catching cuffs — to add personality to this nautical favorite.

simplenotsimple_style_zarablkpants
High-waisted black pants with gold button and strap detail by Zara

7. BLACK PANTS

Need we say more? The options are endless— straight, tapered, wide legs; flat or pleated front; cropped or full length.

Choose what works best for your shape and style. 

This reliable go-to will take you from day to night, office to party, casual to formal effortlessly. And it will always look great with sandals or heels.

simplenotsimple_style_mkhoodie
Merino wool blend hoodie by Michael Kors

8. HOODIE

The lines between clothing categories have blurred, and hoodies have long crossed over from athletic wear to everyday mainstream.

Throw one over a dress, skirt, jeans and a tee— almost anything really. It will add a layer (pun intended) of interest and keep you warm when needed.

Tip: for a “dressier” look, choose luxe fabric (cashmere, merino wool, silk, linen blends) instead of cotton material to up the ante for this sporty staple.

simplenotsimple_style_mangoskirt2
Patterned midi skirt by Mango
simplenotsimple_style_mangoprints
Floral print pants by Mango

9. PRINTED BOTTOMS

Prints are a nice way to add a twist to your wardrobe and to take staples in a different direction.

Pick a print, any print— as long as it speaks to you and makes you happy.

There are many out there ranging from subtle to loud. Skirt or pants? Slim or full?

Your comfort, literally and figuratively, is key.

simplenotsimple_style_blackdresszara
Black shift dress by Zara

10. BLACK DRESS 

Last but not least is the popularly known “LBD” or the “Little Black Dress.”  Little or otherwise, a black dress is one of the easiest ways to get dressed.

Pretty much just slip into it and you’re done. Depending on how you style and accessorize it, this trusty staple can take you anywhere from the grocery store to the office to a night out.

Choose a dress that is versatile enough for day and night, and accentuates what you like best about your body.

Love your legs? Go with one on the shorter side. Adore your arms? Pick something sleeveless.

There you have it— 10 trusty wardrobe pieces that can help make getting dressed easy peasy. Use the list as a starting off point to build on — inject your personality with accessories, dress up or down, use together or pair with more trendy pieces — this core wardrobe will take you through decades, fit the needs of your current lifestyle and work seamlessly with your latest fashion aesthetic.

So get up, dress up (muse or no muse!) and show up. These ten hardworking essentials will get you where you need to go.

In Real Life: How the Author Makes It Work IRL

simplenotsimple_style_floral skirt
Perfect pairing: the classic white shirt with bold printed skirt. Gold shoes complete the dressy casual vibe
simplenotsimple_style_hoodiebink
The hoodie is always a goodie: give this basic some class by choosing luxe fabric
simplenotsimple_style_binkyhoodie
Sporty gray hoodie meets the romantic skirt for this day's work OOTD
simplenotsimple_style_blackpantsbink
The author, Binky, chills in her must-have core essentials
Guest contributor Binky Ilusorio is primarily a skirt girl but is also a lover of most things denim. Former fashion editor who lived and breathed all things magazine for a few years; now dipping a toe back into writing stuff other than Instagram post captions.

The post The Core Wardrobe: Ten Clothing Styles Every Woman Needs In Her Closet appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/08/core-wardrobe-ten-essential-clothing-styles-every-woman-needs/feed/ 0
Date Nights: 5 Reasons Why It’s So Important for Married Couples https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/01/reasons-why-date-nights-are-important-to-married-couples/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/01/reasons-why-date-nights-are-important-to-married-couples/#respond Tue, 01 Feb 2022 23:32:49 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6560 "We set aside this time to discuss our dreams and our hopes as individuals and as a married couple. I’m surprised to learn that the more we talk about deeper feelings with each other, the easier it is to discuss everything else," says pastor's wife and mom Joy about why date nights are so important for married couples especially after the kids start coming.

The post Date Nights: 5 Reasons Why It’s So Important for Married Couples appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_cover
"We set aside this time to discuss our dreams and our hopes as individuals and as a married couple. I’m surprised to learn that the more we talk about deeper feelings with each other, the easier it is to discuss everything else." Photo by Matthieu Huang on Unsplash

There’s a story in the Bible where the King of the Philistines, Abimelech, looked out his window and saw Isaac and Rebekah laughing together. I can only imagine what the couple was doing that convinced Abimelech that Isaac and Rebekah were lovers. There’s more to the story than that, but my point is, it was obvious to the King that Isaac and Rebekah were in love and happy.

It wasn’t mentioned in the Bible but I’d like to think that Isaac and Rebekah achieved this level of relationship because they went out on dates.

Before Aldwyn and I had kids, we went out on dates every week. We’d go out for ice cream, have coffee, eat out, or simply have a walk down at the quay. Some of these dates were planned but most of them were spontaneous.

After 16 years and two kids, it has become even more important to intentionally plan spending regular quality time on a one-on-one basis with each other. Even more so now because other responsibilities and demands have come into the picture.

To give an example, the first real date that I could remember after having kids was on my 30th birthday. Our son was already 5 years old, and our daughter was 2. It was during that date that I realized how much I missed him.

Sure, I woke up beside him every day, we ate together and lived in the same house, but we stopped really connecting with one another.

I didn’t realize how much our lives had changed when our kids came into the picture. And how much we needed to reconnect once again as husband and wife.

Through the years, we’ve learned the importance of date nights and how much it can improve our relationship as a married couple. I’d like to share with you just a few benefits of Date Nights!

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_date1
Learning how to communicate with one another takes time: don't talk about the kids or work on dates

1. Improved Communication

An often cause of misunderstanding is no communication or the lack thereof. Aldwyn and I have agreed that during our dates, we won’t talk about work or our bills. We don’t even talk about our children. (I think we talk about them enough on a daily basis).

We set aside this time to discuss our dreams and our hopes as individuals and as a married couple.

I’m surprised to learn that the more we talk about deeper feelings with each other, the easier it is to discuss everything else.

2. Increased Intimacy

It doesn’t take a genius to plan a romantic date. In fact, one of my favorite kinds of dates is when Aldwyn takes me to our roof deck just to look at the stars.

It might sound simple but these little gestures and alone time together adds up (it also helps if you hold hands).

I now know that just because a couple is married doesn’t mean that they are automatically intimate.

It’s a continuous decision to work at your marriage and slowly but surely become more and more intimate with each other.

simplenotsimple_lifetsyle_date4
Teamwork makes the dream work -- every date is an opportunity to remind ourselves that we’re on the same team

3. Team Mates

If you’ve ever worked corporately anywhere, then you’re familiar with ‘team buildings’.

Date nights are like team buildings for you and your spouse.

It’s a special reminder that my husband and I are on the same team, and we have the same goals. Every date night is an opportunity to motivate, strengthen and understand each other.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_date2 copy
Flashback to our first few years as a couple -- always a hot topic on our dates and works to rekindle our love and commitment to one another.

4. Keep the Fire Burning

We have shared our love story to other people many times, but it’s a story I will never get tired of sharing. And my favorite person to share it with, is my husband. It’s a hot topic during our dates.

It gives us a chance to focus on each other and remember how thrilling and exciting it was when our relationship was unfolding.

We’ll usually start the conversation with the question: “What did you first think of when you saw me that day?” We’ll end up talking and laughing for hours.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_date3
Due to frequent lockdowns, many of our creative date nights have recently been riding around the city on our Vespa

5. Relationship Reset

For the past 22 months, going out on dates has been a struggle because of the pandemic and lockdowns.

But we’ve decided to turn this negative to a positive.

We had to be creative so that we could still bond.

One thing that Aldwyn enjoys doing is riding his Vespa, so, much of our alone time recently involves us riding together.

Seeing him happy and content gives me so much joy. But it wasn’t always like this. In the past I’d always want to do what made me happy, but in a committed relationship, you’re genuinely happy when your spouse is happy.

And it works both ways, Aldwyn comes plant shopping with me and has bought and carried home many of my leafy buys during these trips. He knows these dates make me feel special.

I am far from an expert when it comes to marriage and relationships, but I grow and learn more every day. (And learn more about myself and my husband on every date.)

My prayer as you read this, if you are married, is that you will be excited for your next date. I encourage you to share with each other how you felt the moment you fell in love with each other. I also pray just like Isaac and Rebekah, when people see the two of you, that your love and care for each other is true and evident. 

Second-time contributor Joy Licud has been married to husband Aldwyn for 16 years. They have 2 awesome children, Air Luke, 14 and Leia Snow, 11. The couple have known each other since they lived in Saudi Arabia when they were children. They started their married life in Canada and 8 years ago moved to the Philippines. Joy is a pastor’s wife, stay-at-home mom and homeschools her children. She enjoys gardening and cooking.

The post Date Nights: 5 Reasons Why It’s So Important for Married Couples appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/02/01/reasons-why-date-nights-are-important-to-married-couples/feed/ 0
How To DIY Chinese Jackstones from Orphan Socks https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/27/diy-how-to-make-chinese-jackstones-from-old-socks/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/27/diy-how-to-make-chinese-jackstones-from-old-socks/#respond Thu, 27 Jan 2022 01:42:10 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6430 Remember playing Chinese jackstones? Nope, not the one with the rubber ball and pointy jacks, but the pillow ones, those 5 velvet-y mini bean bags of delight that you and your friends used to play after school. Find out how to make your own DIY set from orphan socks -- yes, the ones whose matching pairs magically disappeared after your last load of laundry...and turn back the clock to your childhood (and bring the kiddies with you)!

The post How To DIY Chinese Jackstones from Orphan Socks appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>

Who remembers those challenging exhibitions called the “cave”, “bridge”, or “falling star”? 

If you do, you most likely played Chinese jackstones. Nope, not the one with the rubber ball and pointy jacks but the pillow ones that look like mini bean bags. Those 5 pillow-y (and crunchy) mini bean bags of delight that you and your friends used to play after school — you know, that addicting game you were all determined to master just to get to the next challenging level or exhibition. That one.

Well, if you were like me, this is one game you thoroughly enjoyed and have fond memories of playing on the dusty floor with your gradeschool classmates.

Find out how to make your own DIY set from orphan socks — yes, the ones whose matching pairs magically disappeared after your last load of laundry…those ones.

Want to know how to easily recycle / upcycle those orphan socks into a favorite childhood game you can play with your kids? Click below.

Bonus: It makes a great homeschool project and a great intro lesson to nostalgic childhood games of our generation.

Camera work and editing: Alba R.

Materials:

2-3 pcs. kids’ (adult size socks are too wide) orphan socks

1 cup uncooked rice, monggo beans (or any small bean variety) or plastic beads

Needle and thread

Ruler / measuring tape

Scissors

simplenotsimple_diy_socks
Single and ready to mingle. Missing their match -- give them a second chance at life by upcycling them
simplenotsimple_diy_rice
Uncooked rice, monggo beans or plastic beads are good stuffing options
simplenotsimple_diy_sew
A homemaker's essential tool kit

Instructions:

  1. You will need to make 5 mini-bean bags aka jackstones using 2 to 3 socks. Choose two different patterns or colors (prepare enough of the same pattern for 4 bean bags and one other pattern for the 5th). 
  2. Measure and mark out 3 inch segments. Make 4 segments from the first chosen pattern. And one segment from the second pattern. You will end up with 5 segments in total.
  3. Turn each segment inside out and sew one side using a backstitch. Make sure there are no gaps to prevent rice from spilling through the gaps.
  4. Fill with 2 to 3 tablespoons of rice/beans (Tip: do NOT fill to the brim, the bag should only be 2/3 full.)
  5. Fold the edges of the opening and sew carefully once again using a backstitch. Don’t worry, it doesn’t have to be perfect, just make sure the stitches are secure and even.

  6. Finish all 5 bean bags using the same method. 

  7. Enjoy! Check out this link for a basic lesson to get you and the kids playing.

What a fun way to connect back to your childhood (watch those dormant skills you honed in the playground come back to life) and a meaningful way to reminisce, spend time and enjoy a little bit of bonding and healthy competition with the kiddies.

Let the games begin!

The post How To DIY Chinese Jackstones from Orphan Socks appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/27/diy-how-to-make-chinese-jackstones-from-old-socks/feed/ 0
Speaking Life: 20 New Year Declarations for 2022! https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/07/new-year-declarations/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/07/new-year-declarations/#respond Fri, 07 Jan 2022 00:14:03 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6245 Instead of starting the new year with resolutions why not start it with lifegiving declarations? As we start 2022, let's go back to the basics -- as every foundation determines how high or how strong the structure is, knowing who we are, who created us and who holds our hearts and our lives in His hands determines how we will face the coming year and all that is in store for us. Here's our list of 20 lifegiving verses to declare as we welcome 2022!

The post Speaking Life: 20 New Year Declarations for 2022! appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_sunset
Hello, 2022, as your first sunrise breaks through the dark skies this new day, our hearts are expectant and hopeful

In the past few years, it’s become a thing for us to end the year with a round table gathering with the husband and the kids to take stock of the year that was and our hopes for the one to come. We usually start with a few questions about what we’re thankful for from the past year and what we’re looking forward to in the next one.

Over the years, we’ve had some pretty regular answers, a few unexpected ones and a handful of profoundly deep ones ever since the kids started expressing themselves more and more.

This year, as we looked back on 2021, it was a little tough emotionally—it was a year of losses, physical and emotional upheavals, faith-stretching, heart-wrenching experiences with a splash of homesickness thrown in – and the kids’ answers were peppered with these feelings alongside their hopeful aspirations for the coming year.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_beach1
As we shift our gazes upward, He reminds us about who we are -- His image reflected on us, each one fearfully and wonderfully made
simplenotsimple_motherhood.jaco4
Amid the chaos and fear that surround us, it's reassuring to know we can always find peace and security when we walk with Him

As I was thinking about what I was looking forward to this 2022, my mind kept going back to this little bookmark I had. It was from a two-day spiritual retreat called Victory Weekend from our church and is usually given to each participant.

It answers the question, “Who am I?” and I thought it was the best place to start the year with these declarations.

simplenotsimple_motherhood.jaco5
"I am a child of God"

WHO AM I?

I AM ACCEPTED…

I am God’s child. (John 1:12)

I have been bought with a price, I belong to God. (I Cor. 6:19-20)

I am a saint. (Eph. 1:1)

I have been adopted as God’s child. (Eph. 1:5)

I have direct access to God through the Holy Spirit. (Eph. 2:18)

I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins. (Col. 1:12)

I have been filled in Christ and I am complete in Him. (Col 2:10)

simplenotsimple_motherhood.jaco2
"I cannot be separated from the love of God."

I AM SECURE…

I am free from condemnation. (Rom. 8:1-2)

I cannot be separated from the love of God. (Rom. 8:35)

I am confident that the good work that God has begun in me will be completed. (Phil. 1:6)

I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-control. (2 Tim 1:7)

I can receive mercy and find grace in time of need. (Heb. 4:16)

I am born of God, and the evil one cannot touch me.  (1 Jn. 5:18)

simplenotsimple_motherhood.jaco7
"I am God's workmanship"

I AM SIGNIFICANT…

I am Christ’s witness wherever I go. (Acts 1:8)

I am God’s temple. (1 Cor. 3:16)

I am a minister of reconciliation. (2 Cor. 5:18)

I am God’s co-worker. (2 Cor. 6:1)

I am seated with Christ in heavenly places. (Eph. 2:6)

I am God’s workmanship. (Eph. 2:10)

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Phil. 4:13)

Focusing on this list of lifegiving verses instead of new year resolutions shifts our eyes back to what’s essential in our lives as Christians — our foundation.

For as every foundation determines how high or how strong a structure is, knowing who we are, (who created us and who holds our hearts and our lives in His hands) determines how we build (or rebuild) our lives — equipping us to face the coming year and all that is in store for us.

We face 2022 with the reminder He is the “author and the perfecter of our faith” and with every pain and trial, is the hope and reassurance that in Him no experience is wasted. He holds us in His hands — comforting, strengthening, polishing, molding us with care — ever faithful and trustworthy. 

We’ve provided a FREE downloadable bookmark for you to print out and help get you started declaring His words of truth this year. 

*Content reprinted from Victory Philippines.

The post Speaking Life: 20 New Year Declarations for 2022! appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/07/new-year-declarations/feed/ 0
11 Key Questions To Get You Started On Your Family Mission Statement https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/05/11-key-questions-to-create-your-own-family-mission-statement/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/05/11-key-questions-to-create-your-own-family-mission-statement/#respond Wed, 05 Jan 2022 21:57:44 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6143 What is a family mission statement? And why is it important? As the kids get older, it’s just good practice to have in plain black and white a rundown of who you are as a family -- your core values, your goals, your purpose -- but not just as a whole but as individuals and what you hold near and dear to your hearts. We made a list of 11 important questions to ask so you can get started on yours -- a great way to get the family together to start the new year!

The post 11 Key Questions To Get You Started On Your Family Mission Statement appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_cover2
"A family mission statement is a combined, unified expression from all family members of what your family is all about." 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families

There’s a big empty frame in our living room that’s been waiting to be filled for a couple of weeks now. Problem is, it’s not waiting for family vacation pics we usually decorate our plain white walls with — nope, this frame is reserved for something more special — our family mission statement. (And it’s taking a bit longer than expected.)

So what exactly is a family mission statement?

“A family mission statement is a combined, unified expression from all family members of what your family is all about – what it is you really want to do and be – and the principles you choose. To govern your family life.”  Stephen Covey (7 Habits of Highly Effective Families)

 

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_cover4
Work in progress: coming up with your own family mission statement takes time

It’s much like a company’s mission statement pinpointing its purpose, goals and standards.

Your family’s unique vision is expressed and anchored by your top ten values and traits — with the purpose of creating a home culture that brings every member together – instilling in each a sense of identity and meaning.

In short, it’s what makes your family #Team (fill in your last name) – who you are as a family, what you believe to be your family’s purpose, core values, aspirations with a fun line or two about what you all love doing, playing, saying or even eating (this was a big one for us).

Why is it a good idea?

As the kids get older, it’s just good practice to have in plain black and white a rundown of who we are, not just as a whole but as individuals in this family, our roles and what we hold near and dear to our hearts.

How to start?

First, include every member in the process. Let each contribute and give each ample airtime to explain (a great time to draw out less verbal members and express what’s been in their heads and hearts all along…you just might be surprised how profound their thoughts are).

Keep it short and sweet.

Have several discussions over a couple of weeks, if needed. The last thing you want is for this to be a chore. Keep the discussion lively and engaging and end it once everyone has had a say…or when their attention is starting to dwindle (for the younger ones especially).

We came up with a list of 11 questions to help you start off your own family mission statement.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_korea
A family mission statement creates a home culture that helps bring direction to the family -- instilling in each a sense of identity and meaning.
  1. Who are we as a family — our purpose, what word/s comes to mind when we think about our family?
  2. What things are truly important to us?
  3. What values, principles and guidelines do we want our family to follow?
  4. What kind of family do we want to be?
  5. What are we passionate about?
  6. What kind of atmosphere do we want to have in our home?

7. What kind of home do we want to come home to?

8. How do we want to treat and speak to one another?

9. What are the unique talents, gifts and abilities of each family member? (Assign one member to describe another.)

10. When we think of our family serving others, what naturally comes to mind?

11. What is our family’s most favorite verse or saying…one that fully embodies what we stand for, or hope to someday?

As the kids get older, it’s just good practice to have in plain black and white a rundown of who we are, not just as a whole but as individuals in this family and what we hold near and dear to our hearts.

There you have it! Give a simpler version to younger kids so as not to overwhelm them and let them add their contributions — family mission statements are meant to change and evolve through the years for this very reason.

So, let them add “We love gummy bears and Legos!,” if they want.

We have a 13, 11 and 8 year old and what I thought was going to be a quick 15-minute family discussion turned into a lengthy, funny, revealing, and meaningful time of finding out what each family member’s idea of “mission” and “family” were.

It turned out to be a great opportunity to really find out what they loved and were passionate about.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_cover2
Our family mission statement's future framed home -- displayed right in the middle of our living area. Coming soon...

This is what we came up with so far…  

We love God and one another.

We live to share and show God’s love to others.

We give our best to Him for He gave His best to us.

We are fun-loving and adventurous.

We are grateful and enjoy blessing others.

We love learning and travelling the world.

We love ice cream and chocolate but also crave salads and yoghurt.

We will act responsibly for the environment inside and outside of our home.

Our home is a safe, joyful and loving place

We listen to each other.

We are kind to one another and will treat each other with gentleness and respect.

We are creative, reliable, and enjoy making new friends.

We pray for each other and are loyal to one another.

We say “sorry” when we make mistakes and forgive when others do too.

We tell the truth and fulfill promises because we know our word has value.

Our family is God’s home.

We’re still editing and polishing it up but hopefully casting our votes on our top picks in our next meeting should help us hone in on our final ones.

Tip: Take your time coming up with your own. It should resonate with each one to make it an effective reminder.

In the meantime, here are three of our favorites to help inspire you…

We hope this made it easier to create your own family mission statement!

Keep in mind, this is ever evolving and can be a good new year activity for your family to add, subtract, refine and pray through as you welcome another year.

So, from our family to yours, happy creating and Happy New Year!

The post 11 Key Questions To Get You Started On Your Family Mission Statement appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2022/01/05/11-key-questions-to-create-your-own-family-mission-statement/feed/ 0
DIY Simple Star Streamer / Advent Calendar https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/09/diy-simple-star-streamer-advent-calendar/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/09/diy-simple-star-streamer-advent-calendar/#respond Thu, 09 Dec 2021 16:04:13 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=6031 Going back to the basics: using simple materials to decorate little areas around the home which need a little TLC. Five minutes, a few things from the dollar store, some paper clips and scrap paper are all we need. Then simply clip and hang...and spend the rest of the time (you would've spent decorating) with the family. Merry Christmas!

The post DIY Simple Star Streamer / Advent Calendar appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>

Is it just me or is anybody else out there still scrambling to get the house ready for parties?

 
Now that the world seems to be opening up little by little…and small, intimate gatherings have been more and more possible, our homes once again (ready or not!) are back to hosting mode this Christmas season. 
 
If you’re in the middle of planning one but don’t really want to tire yourself out (or spend big bucks) to make it party-ready…here’s a simple 5-minute decorating idea to get your home come alive with minimal effort but loads of impact. 
 

This looks especially welcoming in small areas like the foyer, on a mantle, window sill or console table… 

 
Plus it’s versatile too — use it as an Advent Calendar, or display Christmas cards sent by loved ones or clip polaroid photos of the family in different areas of your house. It looks good on the tree too!
  
Are you ready? We hope this simple decorating idea will help you do some festive last-minute touches just in time to welcome long-missed loved ones back to your home. 
 
Video shot by Alba R., video editing by Catya R.

Materials:

1 pack Dollar Store (Todo A Dollar) wooden stars

1 meter string

1 pack Ikea Riktig curtain clips (or 24 pcs. paper clips)

Optional: 1 pack construction paper (cut to preferred size) or 24 pcs. envelopes to make Advent Calendar envelopes.

Instructions:

  1. Individually attach each star to a clip. (Option: layer stars together with glue for a 3-D effect or color stars with markers to go with your Christmas theme)
  2. Loop string to existing Christmas garland or Christmas tree.
  3. Clip on Advent Calendar Cards, Christmas cards or polaroids of family or friends.
  4. Voila!
 

Enjoy making memories this season without stressing over unimportant details. We hope this helped ease some of the usual Christmas decorating weight off your shoulders.  

Merry Christmas!

The post DIY Simple Star Streamer / Advent Calendar appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/09/diy-simple-star-streamer-advent-calendar/feed/ 0
Let’s Talk Adoption…And The Three Ways We Overcomplicate It https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/05/lets-talk-adoption-and-the-three-ways-we-overcomplicate-it/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/05/lets-talk-adoption-and-the-three-ways-we-overcomplicate-it/#respond Sun, 05 Dec 2021 04:18:34 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=5533 "Many focus on how adoption is a blessing and a gift to a child who would otherwise be left without a family, I’d like to emphasize how adoption has become one of the greatest gifts to me," stresses Chrina, wife and mother of three, as she talks about their adoption journey and why common misconceptions keep others from taking that first step

The post Let’s Talk Adoption…And The Three Ways We Overcomplicate It appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_joncoco
Daddy-daughter cuddles are the best -- our daughter Coco, who came to us through adoption, is definitely a fan!

While many may focus on how adoption is a blessing and a gift to a child who would otherwise be left without a family,

I’d like to emphasize how adoption has become one of the greatest gifts to me.

If only you could muster up the courage to pursue adoption, you’d discover that welcoming a child into your family — one that is not biologically related to you — can deepen your faith and beautifully transform the way you think, what you value, and how you live.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_solococo3
"Welcoming a child into your family -- one that is not biologically related to you -- can deepen your faith and beautifully transform the way you think, what you value, and how you live."

Unfortunately, in the world we live in, adoption is seen as something complicated. It’s not a journey many consider for their families.

In fact, it is more of a Plan B for families who can’t conceive or families who choose to live charitably.

My story is quite different. I could conceive, and did, and lost my child due to an umbilical cord accident. That loss opened my heart to exploring adoption as Plan A.

Because of that grief, I realized that while I had empty arms and no child to hold, there were children longing for loving arms to hold them.

In the last several years of advocating for adoption through ROHEI Foundation, I’ve come to find there are common patterns in the way many think that can lead to an overcomplicated view of adoption. Let’s talk about the most common ones.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_kiss
Adoption has become one of the greatest gifts to our family.
simplenotsimple_motherhood_cocosmile
"We tell them how amazing and how beautiful it is that they came into our families in such a unique way."

1. We keep it a secret

When we keep adoption a secret, we signal to our family, friends, and especially our child that adoption is something that should be kept hidden.

But our family and friends take their cue from us. We need to be the ones to define adoption for our children.

We tell them how amazing and how beautiful it is that they came into our families in such a unique way.

We should never relinquish the reins of defining adoption to the world.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_birthday2
"Our family and friends take their cue from us. We need to be the ones to define adoption for our children."

If we don’t define adoption for our children, it becomes a secret and an overcomplication for our children, for our family, and for the people whom we have close relationships with. If we don’t take the lead in this, the trauma of dealing with the world’s definition of adoption can be the root of rebellion and other behavioral responses.

How can we uncomplicate adoption?

Start with an adoption announcement the way you would announce a pregnancy. Let people know how joyful and excited you are to finally meet your child. Let them know that this child coming into your family is precious and loved, and that you won’t let anyone else define what adoption should be to them.

2. We focus on the waiting period

One of the frequent questions I get as an adoption advocate and as the Managing Director of ROHEI Foundation is, “How long does it take?”

For many families, the length of the waiting time becomes the deciding factor, and they don’t pursue adoption if they feel like it will take longer than expected.

However, I think we put too much focus on the waiting period.

It distracts us from the joy that should be ours when we are expecting to finally meet our child, in the same way an expectant mother looks forward to her due date.

Through the wait, you might not be able to physically hold and provide for your child, but you can cover them in prayer and begin speaking life over them.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_cococake
"Every day we wait, a child grows closer to that age of being "unadoptable""

One thing we must also always remember is that while we may delay our decision because of the waiting time, every day we delay our decision is a day longer that a child has to wait for a family.

In the Philippines, when a child in a children’s home turns 4 or 5 years old, they are considered unadoptable domestically.

Simply put, there are no Filipino families willing to adopt them. Every day we wait, a child grows closer to that age. And you must know that their wait will be far more agonizing than ours.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_cocosolo
The wait is almost over for us and 4-year-old Coco -- we are expectantly looking forward to finally making it official next year!

If you’ve already made the decision to adopt, I urge you to restore the joy to the process. Document every requirement, every seminar you need to attend. Make it a part of your child’s story the way an ultrasound photo is part of a pregnant mother’s.

If your child is already with you and you’re just waiting for final documents, it is wonderful that your child is not sitting in a children’s home waiting for their family.

For us, the wait is almost over, and all the milestones and challenges leading up to finalizing Coco’s adoption have all been worth it.

3. We glorify the biological connection

Having the same DNA as my child is no longer important to me. My child’s physical features are not nearly as important as being able to pass on wisdom, strength, and other character traits.

Even for our biological children, we have no control over the physical features we pass on to them.

Regardless, those pale in worth compared to the skills, values, giftings, and even the spiritual inheritance they gain from us.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_cocolololola3
Welcome to the family! Newborn Coco meets both sets of grandparents
simplenotsimple_motherhood_birthday
Coco's first birthday was a joyous family affair!
simplenotsimple_motherhood_allwomenfamily
Coco and baby Brie, the fourth generation, in the line of Cuna women
simplenotsimple_motherhood_lolobake
We tell our daughter Coco, who came to us through adoption, "You're smart like your grandfather."
simplenotsimple_motherhood_cocowithidajojo
Or “You’re so kind and hospitable like your grandmother" -- declarations that help build their identities based on non-physical factors.

Sometimes I think we worry about whether we will love a child who is not biologically our own because they are not like us.

But even with biological children, do we love them because they have our hair or smile?

Are they our children because of the biological bond alone?

For women especially, we usually consider motherhood and mothering as something innate in us. We sometimes catch ourselves “mothering” even the people around us.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_chrinacoco
"My child's physical features are not nearly as important as being able to pass on wisdom, strength, and other character traits."

Why then can we not “mother” children not biologically our own?

One practical thing we try to do in our family is that we focus on non-physical traits they get from us — the physical ones are not put on a pedestal or emphasized.

We like to tell my daughter Coco, who came to us through adoption, “You’re smart like your grandfather,” and “You’re so kind and hospitable like your grandmother,” and we try to help her connect it to family so that she knows that she has an inheritance from us.

We do this with all of our children, and it helps build their identities based on non-physical factors.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_poolfamilyJPG
Create a safe space for your children to grow and be celebrated no matter how they became a part of your family.
simplenotsimple_motherhood_tony2
Sibling secrets: Big sis Coco "spilling the tea" to little bro Tony
simplenotsimple_motherhood_family2
Author Chrina with husband Jonathan and kids (from l-r) Brie, Tony and Chloe (aka Coco).

In our family, we have had one stillbirth, one adoption, and two natural births, and that’s just the way God chose to build our family. 

My encouragement to families who have already chosen to adopt (and hopefully more will be inspired) is to celebrate adoption and to make sure it is something you model for your child, your family, and your friends.

Define the culture, don’t let the world have the first and last say about it.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_preggy
Two year old Coco excited to be a big sister
simplenotsimple_motherhood_tony
Love at first sight: big sis welcomes baby Tony into the family

I advocate for adoption not just because there are many orphaned children, and there are, but also because I would love for more people to experience the joy of welcoming a child into their families in this way.

Let’s share the stories of joy, courage, and victory that take place in so many families that have been built through adoption.

For more information or questions about adoption, visit our link here.

Chrina Cuna-Henson is wife to Jonathan and mother to Chloe (4), Tony (2), and Brie (1). After 10 years in media production and marketing communications in Singapore, she found herself back in Manila as the Managing Director for the ROHEI Foundation and an advocate for adoption. It is her passion and joy to see children adopted into loving homes and families.

The post Let’s Talk Adoption…And The Three Ways We Overcomplicate It appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/05/lets-talk-adoption-and-the-three-ways-we-overcomplicate-it/feed/ 0
Happy Birthday, Jesus! Four Christmas Traditions That Celebrate the True Celebrant https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/02/happy-birthday-jesus-four-christmas-traditions-to-celebrate-the-true-celebrant/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/02/happy-birthday-jesus-four-christmas-traditions-to-celebrate-the-true-celebrant/#respond Thu, 02 Dec 2021 19:54:11 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=5492 "It’s so easy to get lost in the busyness and consumerism associated with the holidays, but traditions ground us, always pointing us back to Jesus, the true reason for the season," says wife and mom of three, Phoebe, as she counts down the days before the big Day with Christmas traditions she and her family practice to highlight the Celebrant who is truly worth celebrating

The post Happy Birthday, Jesus! Four Christmas Traditions That Celebrate the True Celebrant appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_birthday2
We celebrate because our Savior was born.

Christmas is just a few weeks away and we are so excited! It’s the season we look forward to the most as a family, because we get to celebrate our Lord Jesus Christ’s birth and we do so through our beloved Christmas traditions. Beloved because it isn’t just me, mom, who enjoys them! Our girls look for, ask and share their excitement about our traditions every single year.

What exactly are Christmas traditions though?

Well, simply put, they are activities we do every Christmas, centered on the birth of Jesus and its significance in our lives — with the intent and hope of imparting these truths to our children. 

They are a way of passing on our love for and faith in the Lord to the next generation. Through these traditions, we have built in our family a culture of excitement and anticipation for the season. 

No one is too cool to participate! Everyone reverts to being like a child, giddy with delight, hearts overflowing with gratitude.

And most importantly, hopefully, making our love for Jesus grow even more. 

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_tree3
We decorate the tree with special mementos our family holds dear -- reminding each one of Christmases past, humbling our hearts because of how the Lord has been faithful to carry us through each season.

“‘TWAS UPON THE TREE”

The old-school hymn rings true for our first tradition, “‘Twas Jesus, our Savior, who died on the tree (the cross)” —  a fitting reminder of what this season is all about.

The birth of our Savior.

And so it begins for our family. The first tradition that ushers in the Christmas feels in our home is tree trimming.

It really sets the tone at home and somehow causes a shift in us, as anticipation starts building up for the celebration of Jesus’ birthday.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_tree
"Our little one is always the one who gets excited first and urges me to put up the tree!"
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_tree2
Decorating with storebought and handmade ornaments collected over the years make this a cherished tradition the kids always enjoy

After the lights are set, everyone goes to town hanging ornaments that we’ve collected over the years, while the hubby plays his Christmas playlist.

Yet another reason why we started our traditions — to make happy, meaningful memories with our children that they will carry with them as they grow older.

Christmas tree trimming brings families together, not just physically, but also by reminding us of the ultimate sacrifice born that first Christmas day.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_wreath3
"We start with a plain wreath, add some Christmas-y elements, and place the 5 candles."

FOUR SPECIAL SUNDAYS

Next on our list of traditions is the Advent Wreath! This tradition begins on the last Sunday of November and ends on Christmas Day. Through the years, we’ve probably had 3 or 4 wreaths that we’ve DIY-ed.

We start with a plain wreath, add some Christmas-y elements, and place the 5 candles.

The heart of the advent wreath to us is to remember.

It’s a mindful remembrance of what happened over 2,000 years ago in Bethlehem, and again building that eager anticipation for the coming of our Lord Jesus.

We light one candle on the first Sunday, and then depending on what material we choose for the year — we read Christmas books or discuss particular verses from the Bible and sing Christmas carols — and then pray before blowing out the candle.

The kids love this, by the way.

Our girls have not outgrown candle blowing. Sometimes we have to light some up again just so they each get a turn.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_wreath4
"We read Christmas books or discuss verses from the Bible or sing Christmas carols each Sunday before Christmas day"
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_blowing
It doesn't get old -- ever since they were little, our girls have always delighted in participating in this tradiiton every Sunday of December
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_blow
"Our girls have not outgrown candle blowing. Sometimes we have to light some up again just so they each get a turn."

We light up an additional candle every Sunday after, until we light up all the candles including the last candle (the Christ candle) on Christmas Day.

We’ve been doing this every year since I learned it from friends years ago. 

And it’s definitely not exclusive for the family. We have done this with friends too.

It’s so easy to get lost in the busyness and consumerism associated with the holidays, but this tradition grounds us, always pointing us back to Jesus, the true reason for the season.

 
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_calendar
Counting down the days with meaningful activities before the 25th helps foster love for one another and compassion for others

MAKING EVERY DAY COUNT

By December first, we begin our Advent Calendar tradition. We count down to Christmas by doing an activity every single day.

I don’t normally prepare the whole calendar because things do unexpectedly come up. I don’t want to be stuck with a pre-planned activity that’s not doable due to certain constraints.

I want it to be a joy, not a burden.

So I prepare only about a day or two ahead, we also keep in mind other schedules — such as the advent wreath on Sundays, Christmas parties, or playdates — and incorporate these as part of our line-up of activities for the month.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_lightshow
One of our favorite family activities: Christmas Light Displays!
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_noellecard
Little Noelle and her DIY card to give away
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_activity3
Packing up love bags full of food to distribute to street kids and the homeless teaches compassion and social responsibility

We also take the opportunity to share the love of God, by preparing meals for the guards, buying food for homeless children we see on the street, buying presents for one another, making cards, and encouraging others with our words and prayers.

The sky is the limit for this!

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_activity2
Sharing the spirit of generosity and kindness to some of our frontliners
simplnotsimple_lifestyle_activity4
Getting ready to bless people
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_card3
The perfect advent activity for kids of different ages
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_adventactivity
Pretty handmade cards all in a row with words of encouragement and simple messages of hope and faith

It can be as simple as giving a friend a call, or as grand as preparing dinner for the family or friends at home, or as fun as driving around to see the lights in the city, or as meaningful as writing a list of things we are grateful for.

This tradition is another way we build the anticipation for Jesus’ birthday, while exercising generosity, kindness, and faith.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_birthday
All together now..."Happy Birthday, Jesus!

CELEBRATING THE TRUE CELEBRANT

Then, of course, we have our Happy Birthday, Jesus party!

Our family started this tradition with our friends, with the simple reason of instilling in all of us the reason we celebrate Christmas.

We have a program that usually includes gift giving, a talent show and games, which everybody loves of course.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_birthdaynew
Pre-pandemic: Friends and family were invited to a fun party which included gift-giving, a talent show and, of course, blowing candles on a cake for the true Celebrant
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_zoom3
"The pandemic didn't stop us from doing this last year. We did it on Zoom!"
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_Zoom
"It's wonderful that it’s not just my family who looks forward to it every year -- but other loved ones we've invited over the years too"

But the most important part of the party is when we gather the kids and talk about Jesus.

We’ve done different retellings of the Christmas story, we’ve shared the Gospel, we’ve talked about our value and identity in Christ, we’ve talked about a legacy of faith. The whole thing is packaged in a super fun party, but the true gift is the message of hope that we have in Jesus, and the love that He enables us to give to one another. 

Afterwhich, we sing the birthday song for our birthday Celebrant and blow the candles together!

It’s true that Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year. The lights, the lanterns, the Christmas trees, wreaths, decors, music all contribute to the overall vibe.

These traditions, however, remind us that there is a bigger, deeper, truer reason why we celebrate Christmas.

We celebrate because our Savior was born.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_phoebefamily
From left to right: Author Phoebe with princesses, Gianna (7), Noelle (12) and Danae (16) with husband King
Phoebe Lucero is wife and queen to her husband King and mom to three princesses named Danae, Noelle and Gianna. She makes things special for her family and friends with her simple DIY creations and tablescapes. Her love of children and the church are the reasons why she is a Kids’ Church volunteer and teacher. She enjoys journaling her thoughts in Phoebe’s Sari-Sari Stories and hopes to finish and publish her children’s books one day.

The post Happy Birthday, Jesus! Four Christmas Traditions That Celebrate the True Celebrant appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/12/02/happy-birthday-jesus-four-christmas-traditions-to-celebrate-the-true-celebrant/feed/ 0
Festive Feast: How to Create An Easy Christmas Charcuterie Board https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/11/27/festive-feast-how-to-create-an-easy-christmas-charcuterie-board/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/11/27/festive-feast-how-to-create-an-easy-christmas-charcuterie-board/#respond Sat, 27 Nov 2021 20:15:12 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=5287 Calling, calling, all busy homemakers! Get ready to wow friends and family with this delightful and easy mini-buffet for all those upcoming Christmas parties -- charcuterie boards are a busy homemaker's dream. Husband and wife chefs Marvin and Noreena give a step-by-step guide on how to create one from pantry ingredients and a few creative supermarket hacks

The post Festive Feast: How to Create An Easy Christmas Charcuterie Board appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_style_step4
A delightful and easy way to prepare for Christmas parties -- charcuterie boards are a busy homemaker's dream

Don’t be intimidated by its name.

The word charcuterie (pronounced “shahr-ku-tuh-ree” or in true French tradition, drop the first r “shaa·koo·tuh·ree”) as described in Merriam-Webster is “a delicatessen specializing in dressed meats and meat dishes” and is literally translated into flesh (“chair”) and cooked (“cuit”).

Nowadays, a charcuterie board is basically an appetizer platter of cheese and cured meats (ham, salami, prosciutto etc.) plus some crackers, nuts, dips and fresh or dried fruits and veggies.

A charcuterie board is easy and fun to prepare especially during this Christmas season. Serve it during Christmas lunch with family or at a potluck with friends.

simplenotsimple_style_char3
Line up several charcuterie boards as individual stations for a savory and sweet spread of bite-size complements

There are no rules in styling your own board. You can even find some ingredients in your pantry and fridge or at your nearby convenience store.

In addition, the best thing about this is, you don’t have to cook, busy moms! Just put everything together and off you go to your Christmas potluck.

So, let’s get you started. Here are 5 simple steps to assemble your own board:

Step 1: Choose your board

You can present your mini-feast on a wooden cutting board or wooden pizza paddle board that you already have at home, any shape or size will do.  But keep in mind that the size of your board depends on how many people you will feed. Typically, a 12” round board could feed up to 10 people.

Once you’ve chosen your board, half the job is done. See? Easy!

*Tip: For easy transport, place the contents of your board in a cardboard cake box (just call it a “grazing” box). There are some nice, sturdy kraft boxes you can buy in a party shop or at the party section of your grocery. They’re cheap too. Just line it with baking or parchment paper. Perfect if you need it to be portable and ready for your next picnic.

simplenotsimple_style_step1
A wooden board of any shape will provide the perfect stage for your festive feast
simplenotsimple_style_box
For easy transport, pack up the contents in a cardboard cake box lined with parchment paper

Step 2: Build on what you have

Find out what you already have by taking inventory of your pantry, fridge and herb garden.

Build around what you already have in stock– favorite biscuits and crackers your little ones snack on, that stash of nuts the hubby nibbles on while watching TV or fresh herbs growing in your garden to use as garnish (I picked rosemary from ours) – to get an idea of what you already have and what else is missing.

Doing this also helps keep you on budget and will prevent you from buying duplicates at the grocery. 

After-Christmas Tip: For an after-Christmas or New Year gathering, include leftover Christmas ham on your next board.

simplenotsimple_style_basil
Why buy when you can grow your own?
simplenotsimple_style_basilgarden
Check what's available in your own garden first: complete your list with homegrown herbs and veggies. Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash
simplenotsimple_style_closeupchar
Use your stock of household faves of crackers, nuts, and meats to get started

Step 3: Canvas for deals at your local grocery

Buy mixed nuts — they’re cheaper than buying individual packs. Also make sure they’re unsalted to keep them from competing with the salty meats.

Choose ingredients wisely by checking what are currently in season – fruits, veggies and other seasonal items will taste their best and sweetest then and will also be more economical.

Tip: If possible, plan ahead and buy cured meats in advance — it gets expensive around major holidays especially Christmas time.

simplenotsimple_style_nuts2
Choose packs of mixed nuts for more variety
simplesnotsimple_style_ingredients
In-season items are fresher and easier on the budget!

Step 4: Start assembling!

  1. Now that you’ve chosen your board and have your ingredients, you can start assembling by first placing your cheese. Ideally, 3 types of cheeses are a good mix — a soft one , semi-soft and a hard cheese. I like using blue cheese, Brie and cheddar. Spread them out on the board – blue cheese triangles, a Brie wheel, and sliced cheddar make the layout pleasing to the eye and more convenient for guests to pick up (and economical too, bite-size pieces feed more!). Tip: for a Christmas theme, add Edam cheese or queso de bola instead of cheddar.
  2. Place small bowls (or ramekins) of olives, nuts, and dips randomly on the board so they don’t look all lined up in one place.

  3. Neatly stack your crackers sideways and away from damp or cold ingredients that will make them soggy.
  4. Add your cured meats. Fold your salami, ham and prosciutto in half and arrange in an “S” shape to make it look appetizing and easy to pick up with serving tongs.
  5. Mix dried fruits with fresh fruits and fill in any gaps. Tip: add fruits last, right before serving, so they remain looking fresh. 
simplenotsimple_style_step1
Start with your cheeses first -- a variety of soft, semi-soft and hard ones are ideal
simplenotsimple_style_step2
Place small bowls with dips, olives, nuts and dried fruit
simplenotsimple_style_step3
Add crackers, bread sticks strategically -- away from wet or cold ingredients to keep them crisp
simplenotsimple_style_step4
Folding your cured meats in half and arranging them in an "S" arrangement make them easier to pick up and more attractive to look at

Make sure not to leave any space to make your board look abundant. Just use your creativity and imagination. Make it your own.

Step 5: Finally, make it festive!

Use fresh rosemary or basil leaves and style a wreath around your mini-buffet, add berries to make them look like holly. Use different colors and textures for that festive look.

Tip: Dress up your board according to holiday events or thematic birthdays or parties, add little blackboard signs or fun messages to your design, get creative!

simplenotsimple_style_char5
Design a wreath around your mini-feast with rosemary sprigs, basil leaves and berries to complete the Christmas theme

Note: Don’t be limited to savoury items only. A dessert Christmas charcuterie board can be filled with candy canes, chocolates, mini-pastries, churros and chocolate dip to treat the kids and kids at heart. Why not?!

There you have it, an easy-to-assemble charcuterie board that will definitely impress and satisfy your family and friends.

Advanced Merry Christmas!

Husband and wife team, Marvin and Noreena de Asis, are true foodies and enjoy creating dishes and feeding people with their tandem catering and cake businesses. Based in Sydney, Australia, Marvin is a full-time chef and owner of Marvin’s Catering while Noreena is a part-time early childhood educator and owner of Cake Haven.   

The post Festive Feast: How to Create An Easy Christmas Charcuterie Board appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/11/27/festive-feast-how-to-create-an-easy-christmas-charcuterie-board/feed/ 0
DIY Yummy (and healthy) Dog Treats https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/11/06/diy-yummy-and-healthy-dog-treats/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/11/06/diy-yummy-and-healthy-dog-treats/#respond Sat, 06 Nov 2021 21:46:58 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=5164 Are you a dog lover who's tired of guessing what kind of preservatives (and other unhealthy ingredients) are in their fur babies' commercial treats? Try this simple homemade recipe from fellow dog mama, Ria, for an easy-to-make doggy treat that is not just delicious but good-for-them too. Plus, it's safe for humans!

The post DIY Yummy (and healthy) Dog Treats appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>

It all started when I was looking for a healthy option as a snack for my two dogs Khalee (a mixed Pomeranian) and Ashley (my Mini Pinscher).

I wanted to know what I was feeding them instead of just buying regular commercial treats so I went searching for easy-to-do doggy treats I could make at home.

I found one recipe I really liked and the dogs seemed to like too. Made an adjustment with some ingredients (pumpkin is hard to find locally) and replaced it with squash, I also added an extra ingredient that made it a bit more indulgent (feel free to skip this to keep it guilt-free).

My fur babies loved them!

And it only took a few ingredients, a few minutes of prep time and 15 minutes to bake — it made two weeks’ worth of homemade treats that I could store in the fridge.

As an extra ingredient, I added natural peanut butter since I already knew they enjoyed this and had no allergic reactions. Skip this, if you prefer a less indulgent option.

Tip: Take note, use natural peanut butter that has NO Xylitol. Xylitol is toxic and bad for dogs, some peanut butter brands contain this, so read the labels carefully before adding this ingredient. Read here for more info and safety precautions for your dogs.

Bonus! This snack is human grade so humans can actually eat it too. It has a very mild and bland flavor with a hint of peanut butter.

Ingredients:

1 cup flour (healthier option: wheat flour)

1 medium egg

3/4 cup mashed squash 

1/4 cup grated carrots

Optional: 2 tbsp. natural peanut butter (make sure it does NOT contain Xylitol (this is toxic for dogs))

_____

Instructions:

  1. Add flour and egg in bowl, then the mashed squash and grated carrots
  2. Mix well until all ingredients make a dough-like batter
  3. Add peanut butter
  4. Form into balls (or droplets) using 2 teaspoons to mold
  5. Place on parchment paper on a baking sheet with 2 inch spacing between each droplet
  6. Bake for 15-20 minutes at 350 degrees.
  7. Cool down before feeding your fur babies.
  8. Store in fridge for up to two weeks

This recipe makes around 2 dozen droplets. And since I give them two a day as a snack, this lasts around 2 weeks. According to experts, it seems to be within the healthy range for medium sized dogs.

Enjoy pampering your fur babies with these tasty treats!

Ria Ricafort is a freelance account manager for a major broadcasting network, she enjoys reading, good conversations over a cup of coffee and making homemade meals and treats for her two fur babies, Khalee and Ashley. She plans to start a business of special doggy treats next year.

The post DIY Yummy (and healthy) Dog Treats appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/11/06/diy-yummy-and-healthy-dog-treats/feed/ 0
Faith Over Fear: My Story About Life and Loss https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/31/faith-over-fear-my-story-about-life-and-loss/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/31/faith-over-fear-my-story-about-life-and-loss/#respond Sun, 31 Oct 2021 03:22:28 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=4967 The passing of a loved one marks us in ways that only others, who have been through the same loss, will understand. Mom and grandmom, Celia, writes about her life and shares how faith and finding a new purpose have helped her cope with losing her love and husband of 54 years

The post Faith Over Fear: My Story About Life and Loss appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_motherhood_oldpic
The first year we were married, fifty-four years ago

I lost my husband of nearly 55 years, a few months ago, on March 13, 2021.

Suddenly, I found myself alone. No one to prepare breakfast for, no one to play golf with on weekends and share a lunch of Crispy Bangus and Pinakbet at LZM, no one beside me to do our early morning walk around Greenhills, no one beside me on the long drive through Aguinaldo Highway on our way to our house in Canyon Woods, our weekend retreat.

It was as if the lights went out, time stopped and I found myself alone in the dark.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_couple
Roby and me

Fear is very real, fear of losing someone, fear of losing your job, fear of being infected with Covid, fear of the unknown.

In my husband Roby’s case, we knew he had Congestive Heart Failure, a chronic progressive condition that meant his heart wasn’t pumping blood efficiently throughout his body — a diagnosis his cardiologist gave him 9 years ago.

Nevertheless, we lived our lives as we did before  —  travelling (though now limited to short, nearby trips), playing golf, spending time with our kids and apos – knowing it was there but believing that with the right medicine and lifestyle adjustments, it was going to be manageable.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_golf
Golf had always been his lifelong passion, I learned how to play at 65 years old and got bitten by the golf bug as well
simplenotsimple_motherhood_apos
With our seven grandchildren
simplenotsimple_motherhood_ski
After Roby retired, we made sure to travel at least twice a year. Here we are in Lapland in the Arctic Circle, one of our most memorble trips
simplenotsimple_motherhood_vegas
Our 50th wedding anniversary was spent renewing our vows in Vegas

Over the course of 9 years, he was hospitalized for symptoms related to his condition 3-4 times but always recovered. I saw the signs of the disease slowly taking my husband’s life, but I brushed them aside, only entertaining the thought that he would recover and we could bring him home, which was what happened each of those four times.

It was too painful to entertain the thought of losing him.

But the dreaded day came.

I accepted it as God’s will as I gave in to the overwhelming grief that no words could describe.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_wedding
Bright-eyed newlyweds

That night, I felt like I was transported back to when I was eight, a time when I imagined monsters pouncing and clawing at me from beneath the house and chasing me.

We had a laundry area or “labahan” that was located under our old traditional house, my father’s remedy for helping me conquer my fear of the dark was to make a nightly ritual of making me walk from the kitchen door around the house and back around. It was not lighted and was very dark at night.

At this point, my imagination would convince me that the monsters were chasing me and I would run as fast as I could making the full circle back to our kitchen door.

But instead of helping me get over my fear, I became even more fearful of the dark.

A fear that stayed with me until I gave birth to our first child.

I was 23, a young newlywed and a new mother.

Since I had to wake up in the middle of the night to feed her, the darkness soon became unimportant.

Our daughter gave me a purpose, helping me to get over my fear —  suddenly there were no more monsters — just my hungry baby and me.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_cheli
With our firstborn, Cheli -- the reason I got over my fear of the dark

In the days and weeks that followed Roby’s passing, I began to see signs along the way that God was doing something new. It was clear that a season in my life had ended — the ministry to my husband had passed — the years dedicating my life to him abruptly drawn to a close.

And God was telling me, He wasn’t done with me yet.

“You are forever in my life You see me through the seasons. And I look to you and I wait on You“… the song in my mind reminded me.

simplenotsimple_motherhod_plane
Well-seasoned traveller on yet another adventure

A New Thing

I had always enjoyed writing, I was editor-in-chief of my university’s school newspaper and found fulfillment writing, editing and managing the different aspects of running a monthly publication — a long lost love that’s come back to me once again.

I can still remember the smell of newsprint when I scribbled my articles. And when Nanay bought us a typewriter, I would use that to type — the clickety-clack of the keys and the zinging that the handle made when I pulled it to start the next line were memorable.

In the past few months, the words have been pouring out and finding their way onto the computer screen in front of me.  

I find myself on the eve of a new season and my heart is again hopeful and full.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_zoom
Roby celebrating a Zoom birthday last year with the kids and apos from Canada and Manila
simplenotsimple_motherhood_vegs2
A snapshot of our wedding renewal in Vegas at Roby's video memorial

Because I know the One who started the good work in me years ago will complete it. “I always pray with joy because of your partnership with the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this that He who began a work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ.“

I no longer feel lost and in the dark. A new purpose is chasing away the monsters and the fear of the dark once again.  

At 77 years old, I’ve started a new season — He is not done with me yet, He still has work for me to do, a calling to fulfill and a story to tell.

I start this new direction with my first article…which I like to call my first “episode”. 

I hope it’s an encouragement to you today that God promises to be “the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isa 41:13)”

He is with us, He helps us and will help us walk into our different seasons.

simplenotsimple_motherhood_famcomplete
Author Celia with husband Roby and their brood of five kids, two sons-in-law, daughter-in-law and seven grandchildren
Celia Arreza Espiritu, is a mother to five children, Mamita to seven grandchildren. Recently widowed after being married to husband Roby for 54 years and eight months, she now spends her time becoming a memoirist and hopes vignettes of her life will be left as a legacy to the next generation. She has also recently picked up ballet, a childhood dream, as a means of turning her mourning into dancing.

The post Faith Over Fear: My Story About Life and Loss appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/31/faith-over-fear-my-story-about-life-and-loss/feed/ 0
Moving Houses, Moving Lives: 5 Practical Tips To Starting Over https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/30/moving-houses-moving-lives-5-practical-tips-to-starting-over/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/30/moving-houses-moving-lives-5-practical-tips-to-starting-over/#respond Sat, 30 Oct 2021 00:33:30 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=4560 Whether it's to downsize, upsize or to escape to greener pastures (abroad or to the fresher air of the province), moving houses can be a daunting and overwhelming experience. Find out how mom Joy, a veteran "mover" (she's moved 19 times!) does it with 5 practical tips that can make your pending address change a little less unsettling

The post Moving Houses, Moving Lives: 5 Practical Tips To Starting Over appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_movingdog
All packed and ready to go! Don't worry, no animals were hurt in this move. Photo by Erda Estremera on Unsplash

I have lived in 19 different houses, in 12 cities and in 3 different countries and it’s all in the span of 3 decades.

In fact, I have already moved houses twice since the pandemic hit. You can say I’ve had my share of mishaps and victories when it comes to relocating and resettling.

Transitions in life are never easy-peasy, there are several challenges that may come your way. But I’m glad that we truly do learn from our mistakes, and when we get a chance to do something all over again, we do it with growth, maturity, and improvement.

I’d like to share with you just a few practical tips, if you are planning to move houses in the near future.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_todo
Book important services ahead of time to help make the transition to your new home flow seamlessly. Photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters on Unsplash

1. Plan ahead

Prioritizing and scheduling important services (such as internet and moving companies) are the keys to success.

In the country we live in, transferring our WiFi to a different location can take weeks, even months, so this was at the top of our list — especially these days when it’s almost impossible to accomplish work or school without the world wide web.

Next, book the most reliable moving service available to you. We’ve used the same company to help us transport furniture and items from our home 4 times in the past 8 years.

Who needs the added stress of broken, misplaced or stolen items during a move?  

2. Keep important documents in order 

Important documents such as passports, certificates, diplomas, and the like can easily be misplaced during a move.

Having them in a labeled folder and packed in a specific bag will save you the hassle of searching for it when the time comes.

As the years go by, you’ll notice this folder will get thicker and will need to be transferred and reorganized into a bigger binder — categorize properly with labels to avoid misplaced documents in the future.

Tip: Consider investing in a label maker to help organize items including school paperwork, office documents, kitchen odds and ends down to active gear in your garage.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_passport
Keep track of passports and other important documents by storing them in a separate bag. Photo by ConvertKit on Unsplash
Labeled folders = easy location. Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

3. Never underestimate the power of large garbage bags

For as long as I can remember, we have used garbage bags to pack up comforters, pillows, shoes and clothes and anything else that’s light enough to carry.

They’re easy to stuff and transport. Not only that, but once you’re done with them, you can simply store them away until you have to use them for their actual purpose.

But make sure that when you pack your things in the bags, that they are still easy to untie and reuse.

Bonus tip – Plastic, recyclable and paper bags are lifesavers.

I have recently become a “plantita” (lover of plants) and I was worried that transferring my plants to a new location would be incredibly challenging not to mention messy.

Placing each individual potted plant in a plastic or recyclable bag (with handles) eliminated the possibility of getting the soil all over the place and also enabled the movers to carry the plant with less effort and damage.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_pillows
Garbage bags make transporting bulky but light items like pillows and comforters easier . Photo by Sven Brandsma on Unsplash
simplenotsimple_lifestyle_plants
Plantita hack: packing each plant in individual bags makes moving them less messy

4. Learn to let go

Pack things from the least used items to the most frequent ones. This step took the longest time to do, not just because of the quantity of things to pack but also because contemplating what to bring and what to leave behind took some soul-searching. 

I bought these boots at half-off in an outlet store in Canada, this was before we moved to the Philippines 8 years ago. I have dragged it to all the houses that we’ve lived in since, and not once did I wear it. 

One of the beauties of moving is getting a wider perspective of your belongings. 

This is the proper time to contemplate if you are making wise decisions about your possessions — just like the boots that I promised myself I would use but never did.

Lesson learned, I ended up selling it online and making a profit. Yay! Don’t wait years before you decide to let go of things you don’t really use. Decluttering before you move to your new home will help you start with a clean slate and will open up more shelf space for items you do use.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_boots
"I have dragged these boots with me to all the houses we’ve lived in since, and not once did I wear it. Finally decided to sell it online and made a profit."

5. Celebrate 

Once we were all moved into our new place, we celebrated. Yes, the house was a huge mess! There were bins, boxes and garbage bags all over the place and we didn’t know where any of our items were (except for our important documents) but it was a cause for a celebration.

Over a delivery food order, we uttered our thanks, first and foremost to God, for protecting the whole event and to my dear husband, who carried most of our things — he was a superhero! And, of course, to my kids, who were ever so patient and so helpful.

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_family2
Over a delivery food order, we uttered our thanks, first and foremost to God, for protecting the whole event.

Tip: Including your children in this kind of project will teach them more than just learning how to pack, but more importantly, it assures them that they are a part of the team, your family’s team.

With these moving hacks, I hope I have contributed something to you in my own personal way.

Do I love moving houses? Not even the slightest, but I do look forward to the joys of learning and growing while doing it.

I do believe that transitions are part of fulfilling the purpose that God has for us. 

We wouldn’t want to miss out on what He has in store for us now, would we?

simplenotsimple_lifestyle_family
Finally, all moved in at home #19: author Joy with husband Aldwyn, son Air and daughter Snow with pet poodle, Mocha
Joy Licud has been married to husband Aldwyn for 16 years. They have 2 awesome children, Air Luke, 14 and Leia Snow, 11. The couple have known each other since they lived in Saudi Arabia when they were children. They started their married life in Canada and 8 years ago moved to the Philippines. Joy is a stay-at-home mom and homeschools her children. She enjoys gardening and cooking.

The post Moving Houses, Moving Lives: 5 Practical Tips To Starting Over appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/30/moving-houses-moving-lives-5-practical-tips-to-starting-over/feed/ 0
Deck The Halls: Styling Your Home Meaningfully This Christmas Season https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/29/simple-tips-for-decorating-the-home-for-the-christmas-season/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/29/simple-tips-for-decorating-the-home-for-the-christmas-season/#respond Fri, 29 Oct 2021 21:14:22 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=4499 Starting early to decorate your home for the biggest holiday of the year guarantees a more stress and hassle-free Christmas season. Self-taught designer, businesswoman and mom, Jeje, inspires with simple styling ideas to get you started decorating meaningfully in the holiday spirit

The post Deck The Halls: Styling Your Home Meaningfully This Christmas Season appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_style_ornament
Design DIY ornaments (these are made from wood cuttings from a tree branch) with meaningful messages and personal memos significant to you during that year -- to build up a collection of sentimental touchstones for the family to treasure

Now more than ever, in a time of a pandemic, we need to surround ourselves with the Christmas spirit.

As we prepare our homes for the impending arrival of the advent season, it’s the perfect time to reflect on the fact that the One who was born amid a turbulent and troubled world is also the One who set the example of love, generosity and thanksgiving for us.

The Christmas spirit — felt in our hearts but can also be displayed in our homes. What better way to uplift our spirits and get our minds and hearts centered on the true reason for the season but by styling our homes not just beautifully but meaningfully as well? 

Here are some easy and resourceful tips to deck the halls purposefully for the upcoming Christmas season:

simplenotsimple_style_tree1
A gold and white color palette sets a classy and more minimalist look

Choose a color palette

Integrate these colors into all aspects of your home in order to establish a clean and cohesive look.

This is your starting point so take time to decide whether you want to stick to a more traditional palette such as red and green, a more modern-minimalist one such as gold and white or a new color combination you’ve never tried before (why not try blue and gold? Check out the blue-themed tree in our family picture below).

Bright, cheerful colors or neutral, muted ones can set the tone and mood of the home — choosing and coordinating a color palette for decor and accessories make the room a more harmonious and welcoming space family and friends can relax and unwind in.

simplenotsimple_style_tree2
Traditional colors always bring back memories from childhood Christmases

Get creative!

Decorations can be found anywhere. Visit local segunda mano stores for old Christmas decorations you can upcycle using spray paint, ribbons, and more.

You can also search your backyard for twigs to hang your ornaments on or head to your kitchen and create a makeshift tree from old mason jar covers. 

There’s really no need to buy new decorations.

For more inspiration, go on Pinterest to see how others transform old materials into Christmas decorations! 

Remember to be bold and try something new. At the end of the day, it’s your style, your family, and your home – so get the kids involved and have fun with it!

simplenotsimple_style_log
A fallen tree branch from our backyard became an instant candle holder and centerpiece
simplenotsiample_style_family
Mason jar rims can be creatively transformed into a makeshift tree. Unexpected everyday materials used in new ways can make the most beautifully unique decorations

Start early and slowly

Start with your biggest decoration — the Christmas tree –- then slowly work your way to other spaces of your home.

Colorful throw pillows and blankets in your living room, Christmas storybooks under the tree, twinkling lights in the backyard and little Christmas trees on your dining table with other decorations that fit your color palette can slowly be added within the month to gradually elevate your holiday styling.

By starting early, you can layer and build up decor slowly — easing the pressure on both your time and budget.

simplenotsimple_style_table
Elevate your dining room table with candles, ornaments and pretty glassware inherited from your grandmother (or inexpensive ones from a nearby thrift shop)
simplenotsimple_style_books
Place seasonal storybooks under the tree for easy access to enjoy with the kids during those relaxing Christmas nights

Touch on all five senses

Why does it just have to be about what looks good? 

What about including what smells, sounds, tastes and feels good too?

Light a vanilla or cinnamon scented candle; bake gingerbread cookies and place them in a clear jar, play festive Christmas music as you prepare breakfast or wear soft holiday sweaters (or matching cotton pajamas) on Christmas day for a full sensory holiday experience.

simplenotsimple_style_sweater
Matching yuletide sweaters make family photos fun and memorable
simplenotsimple_style_centerpiece
A cinnamon scented candle automatically gives that warm, cozy and Christmas-y feeling to a home

Slow down and savor time with loved ones

Since you already started early, savor spending time with loved ones. Christmas is a time for everyone to slow down and enjoy the holidays.

What better way to do that than with family and friends?

Opening up our home to welcome old and new friends alike is also the perfect way to share a spirit of hospitality and generosity to others (mindful of current safety protocols, of course!) 

Throughout the whole month, continue precious family traditions by creating decorations, reading Christmas stories under the tree, or sharing gift ideas together (just in time to prepare for and complete wishlists for Kris Kringle)

Tip: Take the time to record yourselves, enjoy the moment, and reminisce about Christmases past together — Christmas family videos are the best!

simplenotsimple_style_sign
"Take time to reflect on what He has done on the cross and continue to be grateful for all the blessings He has given in the past year."
Friends and family are always welcome
simplenotsimple_style_hospitality
Pre-pandemic: Sharing a meal with old and new friends alike . During these times, Zoom parties and the occasional intimate family gathering still allow for fellowship and good times

But most importantly of all, take the time to remember the reason for the season – Christ.

Take time to reflect on what He has done on the cross and continue to be grateful for all the blessings He has given in the past year.

One of the best and most genuine ways to style our homes is through the smiles of family and reminding one another that despite the challenging times, there is always a reason to celebrate.

simplenotsiample_style_family
All decked out on Christmas day: (left to right) Husband Glenn, author Jeje and daughters Julia, Jillian and Jazmine
Jeje Quizon is a loving wife to husband Glenn and mom of 3 daughters Julia, Jillian, and Jazmine. She is a businesswoman who designs and supplies bags to top local retail stores. In her spare time, she cooks delicious meals and runs family-owned Qurated Crafts, an online furniture and home accessory shop that customizes and restores vintage pieces.

The post Deck The Halls: Styling Your Home Meaningfully This Christmas Season appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/29/simple-tips-for-decorating-the-home-for-the-christmas-season/feed/ 0
Getting To Know The Jean Pool: The Boyfriend, Girlfriend and Mom Jean Styles https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/07/knowing-your-jean-pool-the-boyfriend-girlfriend-and-mom-jean-styles-and-why-you-should-wear-them/ https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/07/knowing-your-jean-pool-the-boyfriend-girlfriend-and-mom-jean-styles-and-why-you-should-wear-them/#respond Thu, 07 Oct 2021 00:07:30 +0000 https://simplenotsimple.com/?p=4133 It's all relative but, in this case, the Boyfriend, Girlfriend and Mom Jeans are all vying for best friend status as they flatter and complement bodies of all shapes and sizes. Find out from former fashion editor, Binky, what your body shape is and pinpoint which of these three popular styles should be your new best friend

The post Getting To Know The Jean Pool: The Boyfriend, Girlfriend and Mom Jean Styles appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
simplenotsimple_style_jeans1
The most fitting styles to recently emerge in jeans are the ones that, by their very names, evoke a sense of comfort and ease -- the boyfriend, girlfriend and the mom. Photo by Moncell Allen on Unsplash

Jeans.

Quite possibly the staple of staples. Perhaps rivaled only by the white t-shirt. Levi Strauss could not have imagined the long way they have come since the birth of the blue jean in 1873.

They have seen it all and been through it all — they’ve been stoned, washed in acid, overdyed, waxed, relaxed, distressed, shredded, embroidered, beaded, painted. They’ve been without stretch, with stretch, straight, bootcut, flare, skinny, baggy, low-rise, mid-rise, high-rise…

In their different shapes and forms, denim jeans have effortlessly ridden through fashion history managing to convey the pulse of the times; simultaneously embodying what the wearer needed them to be at that particular moment and place — a cultural self-expression in sturdy, cotton twill fabric.

In the past few years, the most fitting styles to emerge in this high-stress environment are the ones that by their very names (and design) evoke a sense of comfort and ease — the Boyfriend, Girlfriend and Mom — reassuring and forgiving pieces of clothing that their current wearers seem to desperately need hanging in their wardrobes

So what exactly are they? And why do you need one in yours? Let’s break it down.   

But first, a brief discussion on body shapes:

Which one are you? 

The Apple body shape (typically described as possessing a round torso — full to average bust, full midsection, narrow hips), the Hourglass (curvy — proportioned full bust and hips, narrow waist), the Column (tall and lean —  also known as the rectangle shape), Pear (bottom-heavy, narrow shoulders), or Athletic (broad shoulders, narrow hips — also known as the Inverted Triangle). 

simplenotsimplle_style-drewboyfriendlevis
Drew Barrymore rocks the typical Apple shape
simplenotsimple_style_beyoce
Beyonce's curves give shape to the Hourglass
simplenotsimple_style_cate
Cate Blanchett carries an elegant Column silhouette.
Jennifer Lopez gives the Pear shape celebrity status
simplenotsimple_style_gwen
Gwen Stefani is in tiptop Athletic form

Now that you know what your body shape is…let’s dive into the jean pool and find out which of these three popular jean styles suits you best.

simplenotsimple_style_oldnavy
The Boyfriend Jean's loose overall fit will flatter and complement Apple, Column, and Athletic forms effortlessly. Distressed jeans from Old Navy.

The Boyfriend Jean

What are they? Slouchy and relaxed. These jeans sit at the hip or somewhere midway between the waist and the hips. And have a loose, straight leg.

Built for women but designed to look as if they belong to the boys, boyfriend jeans are slouchy and relaxed. These jeans sit at the hip or somewhere midway between the waist and the hips. They fit looser all over compared to mom jeans and can cross over from comfortable to sloppy, if you aren’t careful. But a belt to cinch in the loose waist can add shape to this otherwise shapeless jean.

Ideal for: Apple, Column and Athletic body shapes.

simplenotsimple_style_momhm
High-waisted and tapered at the leg, the Mom jean is generally not a mom's best choice unless you have Hourglass, Athletic and Column shapes, that is. Mom jeans from H&M
simplenotsimple_style_momlevis
Steer clear of this style if you're an Apple...the cinched in high-waist will highlight what you want to minimize. Mom jeans from Levi's

The Mom Jean

What are they? High-waisted. These jeans sit at the waist and have a relaxed fit around the belly, hips, butt and thighs, and a tapered leg.

Mom jeans are high-waisted jeans that first became fashionable in the late 1980s and early 1990s. In the late 1990s and 2000s, they were worn mainly by middle-aged women and considered unhip by trendy younger women. Well, mom jeans are back and are spotted on the middle-aged as well as on the hip and the trendy. I have mixed feelings about mom jeans — though they tend to be flattering on most body types and are generally kinder to those of us blessed with bellies — ill-fitting pairs can actually highlight rather than minimize the tummy.

Ideal for: Athletic, Column, Pear and Hourglass body shapes

simplenotsimple_style_gapgirlfriend
A girl's ultimate best friend: the Girlfriend jean is a happy medium that suits most body types. Faded denim jeans from Gap

The Girlfriend Jean

What are they? The happy medium — they fit closer to and higher at the hip and have a tapered slim straight leg.

Girlfriend jeans could very well be Goldilocks’ pick of jeans. Think of them as the happy medium. These are more of a classic fit and if you find boyfriend jeans too baggy for your frame or your liking, and mom jeans are just too, well, mom, girlfriend jeans could be your best friend.

Ideal for: all body types

TIPS BEFORE TAKING THE PLUNGE:

  1. Whatever style you choose, fit is key. You really have to try them on. I tend to think that cuts are not just limited to certain body types. It’s more a matter of finding the pair that fits right and works for you.

  2. Not all styles are created equal. One brand’s boyfriend will most likely not be the same as the versions of other brands.
  3. Just because a particular jeans style is trending doesn’t mean you have to wear it. Choose jeans that make the most of your assets and downplay the so-called flaws.

simplenotsimple_style _jason-leung
"Fit is key. Don't get hung up on labels and sizes." Photo by Jason Leung on Unsplash

4. Don’t get hung up on supposed must-have brands. What is the point in owning a pair by a hot label if they don’t look good on you?

5. Don’t get hung up on size labels either. Sizing is so arbitrary and not only varies from one brand to the other but within the same brand as well.

6. Patience, patience, patience. Finding the right pair often takes more than a few trips to the fitting room.

7. Want to look about 10 pounds slimmer? Opt for a pair that are of a darker hue, hug the hips, have straight legs with a slight flare at the bottom, and go down to the floor covering your at least 3″ heels. Pair them with a top that fits close but isn’t tight.

8. I’m bigger than average and tend to do better with American brands. Old Navy and Gap are my go-tos. But sometimes, on really good days, I luck out at Uniqlo, too.

Guest contributor Binky Ilusorio is primarily a skirt girl but is also a lover of most things denim. Former fashion editor who lived and breathed all things magazine for a few years; now dipping a toe back into writing stuff other than Instagram post captions.

The post Getting To Know The Jean Pool: The Boyfriend, Girlfriend and Mom Jean Styles appeared first on Simple Not Simple.

]]>
https://simplenotsimple.com/2021/10/07/knowing-your-jean-pool-the-boyfriend-girlfriend-and-mom-jean-styles-and-why-you-should-wear-them/feed/ 0